| 0000 | n | Location where everything is alright. Specifically the sofa Joy sits on at home | The Triskele | 12/02/’2412/02/2024 15:13:21 | 12/02/’2412/02/2024 16:13:25 |
| 1-2-3 wash yourself, ducky! | exc | I am throwing a handful of wet sand at you | The Sisterhood | 09/03/’2109/03/2021 00:10:43 | – |
| 14155 | n | Iliff | M & N | 16/04/’2116/04/2021 14:31:17 | 01/01/’2301/01/2023 13:54:33 |
| 81 | exp | Response to “night-night!” | Francis | 19/03/’2119/03/2021 22:30:39 | 08/01/’2208/01/2022 16:24:26 |
| a bob short of a quid | exp | Confused. Of questionable sanity or intellect | Clare | 24/05/’2524/05/2025 23:44:23 | – |
| a boy is a boy… | exp | A callback to the proverb:
A boy is a boy
Two boys are half a boy
Three boys are no boy at all
…a commentary on the productivity of boys hired to do work, when child labour was considered acceptable | Pa | 16/05/’2116/05/2021 23:37:32 | 21/10/’2421/10/2024 12:57:46 |
| a chill wind in the Trossachs | exp | The sensation of wearing a kilt¹ on a cold day | M & N | 10/03/’2210/03/2022 18:03:24 | – |
| a crow, letting | exp | I am pressing lightly on your head with the fingernails of one hand, and am claiming that a crow has settled there in case you should think that I am pressing lightly on your head with the fingernails of one hand | Granny | 12/03/’2112/03/2021 15:02:18 | 12/03/’2112/03/2021 21:14:17 |
| a day late and a dollar short | adj | Applies to work that is both late and substandard | Mark | 09/03/’2209/03/2022 15:13:35 | – |
| a kangaroo loose in the top paddick | adj | Confused. Of questionable sanity or intellect | Clare | 27/05/’2127/05/2021 14:19:30 | 24/05/’2524/05/2025 23:32:21 |
| a light to lighten the genitals | exp | Graffito seen in the gentlemen’s convenience of The Perch inn, Oxford, written beneath the single dim lamp on the wall above the urinals | Mark | 06/07/’2106/07/2021 15:03:27 | 29/11/’2329/11/2023 21:41:53 |
| a peach of a boat | exp | Literally: A very nice boat.
Intended meaning: A fishing boat | Mum | 05/03/’2105/03/2021 13:58:00 | 07/03/’2107/03/2021 01:07:32 |
| a pint of water’s a pound and a quarter, except in US where it’s less | exp | Counter-mnemonic to Americans’ wholly misleading “A pint’s a pound the whole world around” | Mark | 21/08/’2321/08/2023 08:29:31 | 30/08/’2330/08/2023 22:43:01 |
| a spur to keep your prick inside your tent | exp | Essentially nonsense | M & N | 28/01/’2528/01/2025 01:26:39 | – |
| a touch of the don’t-want-to-goes | exp | Reluctance to go somewhere | Dad | 19/03/’2119/03/2021 15:08:22 | 21/10/’2421/10/2024 15:19:46 |
| A-flute | v | To campaign with the use of an A-frame adorned with corflutes proclaiming the campaginer’s message | Clayhoffs (aka Westerdons) | 22/10/’2322/10/2023 00:40:37 | 22/10/’2322/10/2023 10:39:14 |
| aber eine wurst hatte zwei ende | exp | But a sausage has two ends | Clare | 20/01/’2320/01/2023 01:00:35 | – |
| abratadabra | exc | Answer to the question “What’s the magic word?” | Nicholas | 30/03/’2130/03/2021 15:21:54 | – |
| accident | n | An impulse purchase | Mark | 02/01/’2202/01/2022 12:58:03 | 08/01/’2208/01/2022 01:10:41 |
| Action Town | n | Acton Town | Naomi | 08/10/’2208/10/2022 01:11:57 | – |
| add more lightness | exp | Cut out anything superfluous | Mark | 27/02/’2327/02/2023 12:29:19 | – |
| administrivia | n | Administrative trivia. Valueless paperwork | Riverbankers | 04/04/’2504/04/2025 23:49:53 | – |
| affluence of incahol | exp | Influence of alcohol | Iliff family | 21/11/’2421/11/2024 16:05:29 | 21/11/’2421/11/2024 16:07:01 |
| AFM | n | Anger management | Mark | 23/11/’2123/11/2021 22:50:42 | – |
| ah-ahs | n | Poo | Mum | 19/03/’2119/03/2021 15:16:12 | – |
| aha, Rasputin, the mad monk, climbing up those Russian steppés! | exc | Here is the rice pudding. All hail the rice pudding | Pa | 04/03/’2204/03/2022 00:43:42 | – |
| ahiggit ahugget | exp | That person is taking self-deprecation to extremes | Pa | 16/05/’2116/05/2021 23:20:58 | – |
| air on a ringtone | n | Musical pap. Lift music | Mark | 28/01/’2528/01/2025 01:25:55 | – |
| alec tricity | n | Electricity | Dad | 25/05/’2125/05/2021 15:47:05 | – |
| aleebee | n | Alibi | Riverbankers | 21/08/’2321/08/2023 08:50:26 | – |
| alibaba | n | The laundry basket at Greenmantle | Iliff family | 27/05/’2127/05/2021 14:14:20 | 21/11/’2121/11/2021 13:10:26 |
| all of a sudden a big black pudding came floating through the air | exc | You are about to be struck during a pillow fight | Granny | 14/03/’2114/03/2021 13:48:16 | 09/11/’2409/11/2024 15:06:01 |
| all the way round sir? | exp | Literally “shall I serve you everything?” Can be used to imply a hint of gluttony | Mark | 06/11/’2106/11/2021 12:41:42 | 06/11/’2106/11/2021 12:44:45 |
| All’ Barone | n | The pub chain All Bar One | Mark | 29/12/’2229/12/2022 15:09:40 | 15/10/’2415/10/2024 14:12:59 |
| ambliance | n | Ambulance | Jeremy | 04/03/’2204/03/2022 16:02:41 | – |
| American seat | n | A merry conceit | Pa | 27/02/’2127/02/2021 16:17:37 | 05/03/’2105/03/2021 14:21:32 |
| amontiddly-doh | n | Amontillado, a variety of sherry | Naomi | 20/06/’2320/06/2023 15:53:29 | 26/06/’2326/06/2023 09:38:55 |
| amtriguous | adj | A phrase or utterance capable of three different interpretations | Mark | 24/04/’2324/04/2023 14:31:03 | – |
| ancestor tea | n | The weak tea resulting from topping a pot up with hot water a second or subsequent time | Pa | 26/05/’2126/05/2021 12:50:46 | 31/10/’2431/10/2024 15:46:58 |
| and hadn’t we the gaeity at Phil the fluter’s ball | verse | A line that Dad would sing at the most unexpected of times | Dad | 19/03/’2219/03/2022 16:12:24 | – |
| and his bum fell off and his bum fell off | verse | Nonsense song that fits part of the theme tune of the BBC TV series Shakespeare & Hathaway – Private Investigators | Naomi | 18/01/’2518/01/2025 23:43:13 | – |
| and the band played Believe it if you like | exp | I don’t believe it | Mark | 19/03/’2219/03/2022 15:50:25 | 16/12/’2416/12/2024 10:50:16 |
| another saucer of milk? | exp | Goodness me, that was a catty [mean, spiteful] comment! | Mark | 07/11/’2107/11/2021 23:30:13 | 22/12/’2422/12/2024 01:01:06 |
| anti-cretinous | adj | Anti-tetanus | Mark | 26/05/’2126/05/2021 12:31:56 | – |
| any more laid back, his bum would fall off | exp | Extremely relaxed, perhaps reprehensibly so | Mark | 26/05/’2126/05/2021 12:34:49 | 17/08/’2417/08/2024 11:08:57 |
| appalAchian contrOllay | adj | Of French wines, appellation d’origine contrôlée… basically, not plonk | Mark | 12/07/’2212/07/2022 01:07:00 | 17/12/’2417/12/2024 12:22:51 |
| aprishotts | n | Apricots | Sam | 11/02/’2411/02/2024 00:53:07 | – |
| are bears Catholic? | exp | Yes | Mark | 25/11/’2125/11/2021 11:38:18 | – |
| are we gentry or do we stack? | exp | In practice it seemed to mean “I’m clearing the table now” between the courses of a meal, though none of us made much sense of it at the time | Granny | 05/07/’2205/07/2022 01:06:08 | – |
| are you all sitty comfibowl two-square on your botty? | exp | Are you sitting comfortably? | M & N | 20/10/’2420/10/2024 01:26:23 | 15/12/’2415/12/2024 10:50:48 |
| ars bin | n | Wing bean | Clare | 08/03/’2208/03/2022 21:18:25 | – |
| arsnip | n | Parnsip | Mark | 08/03/’2208/03/2022 21:02:32 | – |
| as innocent as a nun at a bus stop | exp | To all appearances, throughly innocuous | Mark | 11/02/’2411/02/2024 01:06:53 | 11/02/’2411/02/2024 11:11:17 |
| as thick as an elephant bap | adj | Not conspicuously astute | Mark | 07/11/’2207/11/2022 00:22:16 | 07/11/’2207/11/2022 00:26:15 |
| as your mummy say, you’ll grow into it | exp | I accept that the clothing I have supplied is rather too large for you | Mark | 28/07/’2428/07/2024 15:08:32 | – |
| ashpan | n | Panache | Clayhoffs (aka Westerdons) | 07/11/’2207/11/2022 01:02:52 | – |
| assumptions make an ass of ump and tions | exp | Avoid making assumptions | Mark | 25/05/’2125/05/2021 16:11:23 | – |
| audient | n | An individual member of an audience | Mark | 13/12/’2413/12/2024 21:12:11 | 14/12/’2414/12/2024 12:15:58 |
| audio black | n | Silence | Mark | 28/07/’2428/07/2024 14:41:13 | – |
| Aunty Brute | n | Naomi’s name for Aunt Dorothy | Naomi | 04/03/’2204/03/2022 00:56:57 | 05/03/’2205/03/2022 16:10:38 |
| Aunty Mark | n | Uncle Mark | Joanna | 25/03/’2125/03/2021 12:42:31 | 25/03/’2125/03/2021 13:53:04 |
| Australian naming | n | The practice of assigning proper names that are unduly literal, such as Great Barrier Reef, Northern Territory, Snowy Mountains, Great Sandy Desert, Mitchell Multilevel Falls, Great Dividing Range etc | Mark | 19/08/’2119/08/2021 13:07:51 | 05/09/’2205/09/2022 13:29:21 |
| autocucumber | n | The autocorrect function common on smartphones | Riverbankers | 24/04/’2324/04/2023 14:56:32 | – |
| automagically | adv | Automatically, and with impressive élan | Mark | 21/01/’2421/01/2024 14:53:04 | – |
| avian fornication | n | Thing of no regard | Mark | 03/09/’2303/09/2023 10:43:40 | – |
| B I tish | n | A woman considered to be mean, overbearing or contemptible | Dad | 19/03/’2219/03/2022 15:14:24 | – |
| B-fart | n | Beef heart, an allegedly scrumptious type of offal | Pa | 18/08/’2318/08/2023 16:03:48 | 10/09/’2310/09/2023 12:20:52 |
| babu peechi lal | n | Self-important person | Pa | 08/10/’2208/10/2022 01:26:27 | – |
| baby abluga | n | Baby beluga | Joy | 04/09/’2104/09/2021 13:34:37 | – |
| back dazzler | n | A vehicle’s high-intensity rear foglight, especially when used at night in the wet | Mark | 07/01/’2407/01/2024 00:22:03 | – |
| bagaloons | n | Capacious knickers | Clare | 27/02/’2127/02/2021 23:58:59 | 30/03/’2230/03/2022 00:49:44 |
| BANANA | exp | Build Absolutely Nothing Anywhere Near Anyone, a more extreme position than NIMBY (Not In My Back Yard) | Mark | 13/12/’2413/12/2024 21:29:35 | – |
| barger | n | Bursar | Mark | 13/12/’2413/12/2024 21:06:24 | 13/12/’2413/12/2024 21:54:06 |
| Barley-sugar Legs | n | His sisters’ pet name for Dad | Dad | 29/01/’2229/01/2022 00:37:56 | – |
| barsteward | n | Bastard (in its pejorative rather than descriptive sense) | M & N | 03/12/’2303/12/2023 00:36:57 | – |
| Basingrad | n | Basingstoke, a town in Hampshire | Mark | 23/04/’2123/04/2021 23:12:59 | 15/12/’2415/12/2024 10:46:57 |
| Basingscrote | n | Basingstoke, a town in Hampshire | Naomi | 21/11/’2421/11/2024 15:29:30 | – |
| basking hickory stick | n | Lavatory bowl floater | Mark | 28/02/’2128/02/2021 00:02:00 | 28/02/’2128/02/2021 12:29:23 |
| bastardsphere | n | The inglorious company of spammers, hackers & phishers | Mark | 13/05/’2213/05/2022 01:03:46 | – |
| bat tsch-tsch | n | Bathroom cleaner | Riverbankers | 17/03/’2117/03/2021 21:01:46 | 21/03/’2121/03/2021 22:42:36 |
| bathroom thought | n | A thought, had while using the facilities that exits your mind as you exit the smallest room | Aoife | 12/03/’2112/03/2021 15:07:02 | 12/03/’2112/03/2021 16:17:11 |
| be told! | exc | Don’t argue! | Pop | 28/02/’2128/02/2021 00:11:19 | 02/03/’2102/03/2021 16:19:37 |
| bearded mushrooms | n | Breaded mushrooms | M & N | 27/07/’2127/07/2021 21:32:46 | – |
| bee-loud glade | verse | Invoked when walking amongst busy insects in a rural setting | Naomi | 26/06/’2326/06/2023 09:31:47 | – |
| beef cut | n | Crew cut | Uncle Tony | 30/03/’2230/03/2022 01:19:59 | – |
| beefa leefa | n | Beef olives | Pa | 02/03/’2202/03/2022 23:18:39 | – |
| beep conveyor | n | One of those vehicles used in airports and hospitals for conveying loud, unsettling beeps around the place | Mark | 24/01/’2324/01/2023 23:27:12 | 22/01/’2422/01/2024 12:06:14 |
| Beezlebub | n | Mispronunciation of Beelzebub | Mark | 28/02/’2128/02/2021 00:06:38 | – |
| belay | v | Cease. Stop. Desist | M & N | 04/04/’2504/04/2025 23:50:41 | 04/04/’2504/04/2025 23:50:33 |
| Belgian pish | n | The beerish substance sold under the name Stella Artois | M & N | 19/07/’2219/07/2022 23:54:01 | 02/03/’2302/03/2023 15:28:35 |
| belten our tights | exp | Tighten our belts | M & N | 04/05/’2404/05/2024 23:48:47 | – |
| Ben Yehuda | n | Pa’s nickname for Benno | Pa | 09/03/’2209/03/2022 22:23:27 | – |
| bet that’s cooled his biryani down a bit | exp | He seems to find that drink refreshing | M & N | 27/05/’2127/05/2021 14:50:45 | – |
| Betelgwayzay | n | Betelgeuse (aka α Orionis), red supergiant and 10ᵗʰ brightest star in the sky | Aoife | 09/03/’2209/03/2022 15:06:25 | – |
| betty swallocks | n | Perspiration of the gentleman’s area | M & N | 01/07/’2201/07/2022 13:30:15 | – |
| bezz pawk | adj | Bespoke | Dad | 12/05/’2112/05/2021 22:30:38 | – |
| biddle biddle | exp | The ringing sound of a GPO Trimphone, the trendy alternative to the standard issue phone in the 1970s | M & N | 06/09/’2106/09/2021 01:04:13 | 23/10/’2423/10/2024 11:10:43 |
| bidet | n | Rear wash-wipe mechanism (of a vehicle) | Riverbankers | 05/07/’2205/07/2022 00:57:38 | 25/05/’2525/05/2025 10:18:21 |
| big clock | n | Thing to be coveted | Granny | 28/02/’2128/02/2021 00:12:49 | – |
| big crisp | n | Poppadom | M & N | 09/03/’2209/03/2022 15:22:12 | – |
| big organs run in the family | exp | Gleefully puerile response to use of the word organ | M & N | 25/11/’2325/11/2023 13:52:28 | 25/11/’2325/11/2023 18:13:24 |
| Biggles flies undone | exp | 1. (Meaningless interjection at any allusion to the fictional character James Bigglesworth, or to any other similarly improbably ept aviator)
2. Your flies are undone | M & N | 26/05/’2126/05/2021 12:47:10 | – |
| Bildad the Shuhite | n | The shortest man in the christian bible | Pa | 18/04/’2218/04/2022 00:13:27 | – |
| bilge | n | Biology (as a school subject) | Iliff family | 13/12/’2413/12/2024 21:18:37 | – |
| bim | n | Bowel movement | King family | 28/02/’2128/02/2021 00:15:37 | 19/03/’2219/03/2022 22:42:50 |
| bingbongabangbang | exp | I predict the credits will roll, or an ad break will start, in the next few seconds (when watching TV) | M & N | 07/01/’2407/01/2024 00:25:39 | – |
| birdy num-num | n | Bird seed | M & N | 11/01/’2211/01/2022 15:42:09 | – |
| bish | n | A forgivable mistake | Iliff family | 02/04/’2402/04/2024 16:04:40 | – |
| BKJ | adj | Bright, keen & jolly | Mum | 24/02/’2124/02/2021 23:20:05 | 22/12/’2422/12/2024 11:51:10 |
| black-coated workers | n | Prunes | Iliff family | 11/08/’2111/08/2021 00:12:14 | 02/01/’2202/01/2022 12:01:01 |
| blick auf | exp | Wake up! | Naomi | 28/02/’2128/02/2021 00:20:25 | 02/01/’2202/01/2022 12:02:42 |
| blind mullet | n | Seaborne bolus | John T | 30/03/’2130/03/2021 15:24:16 | – |
| bloody great balloons | exp | Callback to the desperate cry of a vendor of oversized balloons outside Madame Tussauds on a chilly spring day: “Balloons! Balloons! Bloody great balloons!” | M & N | 18/04/’2218/04/2022 00:28:20 | – |
| blop | n | Like blob, but ploppier | Naomi | 13/04/’2113/04/2021 13:07:14 | – |
| blue and green should never be seen except on a donkey’s back | exp | Style guidance | Naomi | 02/04/’2402/04/2024 16:06:41 | 02/04/’2402/04/2024 18:19:16 |
| BO-er | n | Deodorant | King family | 27/07/’2127/07/2021 21:27:30 | 12/02/’2212/02/2022 13:02:31 |
| Bob Cox | n | The physicist Brian Cox | Naomi | 17/09/’2117/09/2021 21:54:05 | – |
| Bob Donovan | n | Generic term for guitar-wielding singer-songwriters | Naomi | 18/01/’2518/01/2025 23:43:14 | – |
| bobaligoo | n | Boat fender | Naomi | 28/02/’2128/02/2021 00:23:27 | 14/02/’2214/02/2022 11:13:14 |
| Bob’s your parent’s sibling | exp | It’s as easy as that | Riverbankers | 11/02/’2211/02/2022 12:03:44 | – |
| body coddler | n | Sleeveless coat, or gilet | Mark | 20/03/’2120/03/2021 16:07:17 | 05/12/’2105/12/2021 15:37:50 |
| bog | n | Dog | Joy | 12/03/’2112/03/2021 15:15:04 | 12/03/’2112/03/2021 16:10:39 |
| bog lolly | n | Urinal deodoriser block | Benno | 05/05/’2405/05/2024 00:28:46 | – |
| bogflosher | n | Drain unblocker | Mark | 25/05/’2125/05/2021 21:54:43 | – |
| bogpaper music | n | Homogenised soulless featureless maundering lift music – tear off amount required | Mark | 19/03/’2119/03/2021 15:25:43 | 19/03/’2119/03/2021 15:26:35 |
| boil the billy | v | Make tea | Clayhoffs (aka Westerdons) | 07/11/’2207/11/2022 01:01:11 | – |
| boinga | n | Kangaroo, especially when in motion | Clayhoffs (aka Westerdons) | 15/11/’2215/11/2022 19:38:03 | – |
| boîte sur toit | n | A roofbox, one of those enclosed roofracks for cars | Naomi | 12/11/’2312/11/2023 00:39:54 | 26/11/’2426/11/2024 20:24:24 |
| bonbon ching gum caramel! | exp | (No real meaning – just a bonding cry) | Bel | 06/11/’2106/11/2021 12:50:04 | 24/12/’2124/12/2021 11:36:06 |
| bong | n | Person defined by their location, role or relationship | Naomi | 28/02/’2128/02/2021 14:50:47 | 03/03/’2103/03/2021 13:59:37 |
| bongo wongs | n | Loose skin on the underside of a person’s upper arm, often given the insulting name bingo wings | M & N | 26/07/’2426/07/2024 20:45:50 | – |
| boom and scrunch | n | The parlour game zoom and screech | Mark | 22/03/’2122/03/2021 23:42:10 | 24/04/’2524/04/2025 12:06:37 |
| Boom-holé | n | Fictional planet | M & N | 27/07/’2127/07/2021 21:35:28 | 25/05/’2525/05/2025 10:24:44 |
| Botticchrachi | n | Botticelli, the Italian painter noted for his nudes | Riverbankers | 02/04/’2402/04/2024 16:01:32 | 14/12/’2414/12/2024 12:26:09 |
| bouncealine | n | Trampoline | Lyra | 30/03/’2130/03/2021 15:26:04 | – |
| Brandywine Thistlebottom | n | The actor Benedict Cumberbatch | Naomi | 24/01/’2324/01/2023 23:28:01 | – |
| breathe in, it’s good for you | exp | Please cease complaining about this stinky farmyard | Granny | 26/02/’2126/02/2021 15:49:30 | – |
| brown katies | n | Bronchitis | Dad | 25/05/’2125/05/2021 15:47:45 | – |
| brunty | adj | Brunette | Joy | 30/03/’2130/03/2021 21:12:54 | – |
| bug rake | n | Hair comb | Bel | 16/03/’2116/03/2021 14:51:18 | 28/02/’2228/02/2022 16:11:36 |
| bull fiddle | n | Stand-up bass | Mark | 30/09/’2430/09/2024 10:52:15 | – |
| bum in the air | adj | Hard at work | Win | 27/02/’2227/02/2022 14:27:28 | – |
| bum of the flightle bee | exp | Flight of the bumblebee, the Rimsky-Korsakov orchestral piece | Dad | 22/02/’2122/02/2021 21:57:24 | 27/02/’2127/02/2021 16:00:20 |
| bumbag aloo | n | Bombay aloo | Paul H | 25/03/’2125/03/2021 13:57:13 | – |
| bumbalo bag | n | Bumbag (US: fannypack) | Naomi | 15/11/’2215/11/2022 20:24:05 | – |
| bumcack | n | Comeback | Naomi | 21/01/’2421/01/2024 01:30:27 | – |
| bumhug | n | Humbug (the hard minty sweet) | Mark | 24/03/’2124/03/2021 15:51:38 | 31/03/’2231/03/2022 01:43:46 |
| bumnuts | n | Eggs | Win | 27/02/’2227/02/2022 14:17:08 | – |
| bumpity bolliko (n) | n | Collision, wreck, prang | Naomi | 03/04/’2103/04/2021 13:25:20 | 17/12/’2417/12/2024 10:32:32 |
| bumpity-bolliko (adj) | adj | Uneven or bumpy (of a road) | Naomi | 07/04/’2107/04/2021 21:54:18 | 16/12/’2416/12/2024 16:01:56 |
| Bunny Park | n | Alwyne Road Park, Hanwell, London | Hanwell Kings | 21/11/’2421/11/2024 15:35:26 | – |
| burgalarm | n | Burgler alarm | Riverbankers | 17/07/’2217/07/2022 00:28:33 | – |
| Burly Chassis | n | The Welsh singer Shirley Bassey | Iliff family | 03/09/’2303/09/2023 10:24:28 | – |
| but does it make toast? | exp | Satirical distillation of luddite objections to an innovative product | Mark | 30/11/’2430/11/2024 16:13:55 | 01/12/’2401/12/2024 12:20:11 |
| buttons on a wall | exp | Response to “so what?” | Mark | 18/04/’2218/04/2022 00:18:52 | – |
| by gum I’m stuck. What am I? | exp | [Riddle] | Pop | 10/09/’2310/09/2023 12:28:05 | 15/09/’2315/09/2023 15:55:40 |
| canned elephant’s prick | n | Tinned meat (eg Spam) | M & N | 27/02/’2327/02/2023 12:49:59 | – |
| can’t get his tongue round his Rs | adj | Has difficulty saying the letter R | Mum | 31/10/’2131/10/2021 23:45:08 | – |
| case case case | exp | In any case | Bel | 02/03/’2102/03/2021 00:42:14 | – |
| cash’n’flash | n | Pay-and-display car park | Mark | 03/03/’2103/03/2021 13:57:03 | 02/01/’2202/01/2022 12:52:34 |
| cast nasturtiums | exp | Cast aspersions | King family | 02/02/’2202/02/2022 00:41:41 | 02/02/’2202/02/2022 10:50:58 |
| castrated | adj | Decaffeinated (of coffee or tea) | Pa | 20/03/’2120/03/2021 21:06:34 | 12/05/’2112/05/2021 21:51:24 |
| catameringue | n | Catamaran, the twin-hulled species of boat | Iliff family | 18/01/’2518/01/2025 23:43:11 | 28/01/’2528/01/2025 11:04:17 |
| catch a falling poo | verse | Catch a falling poo and put it in a packet,
Try not to make a mess.
Catch a falling poo and put it in a packet,
Send it to the NHS.
—to the tune of Catch a falling star | Mark | 20/06/’2320/06/2023 15:48:53 | – |
| chained to the oar of a magnificent galley | exp | Your humble labours in pursuit of a noble objective do not go unnoticed | Pa | 16/05/’2116/05/2021 23:24:41 | – |
| changed his 40 for two 20s and found he wasn’t wired for it | exp | Catty comment about a man who proves over-ambitious in his philandering | Pa | 29/10/’2329/10/2023 00:21:00 | 22/01/’2422/01/2024 11:59:06 |
| charge like a wounded bull | v | Charge exorbitantly | Mark | 02/03/’2102/03/2021 00:33:22 | 19/03/’2219/03/2022 22:58:06 |
| charming ladies | n | Naked women | Francis | 15/09/’2315/09/2023 15:54:22 | – |
| cheerum chorum chaw chocalorum | verse | Callback to:
Cheerum chorum chaw chocalorum
Pinga Ninga nee-nay
Pinga ninga nay
Very werry goshy washy tie tie tingo
Very werry goshy washy
Goshy washy tingo
…or something along those lines | Granny | 23/11/’2323/11/2023 23:15:50 | 28/11/’2328/11/2023 13:20:20 |
| Chi | n | Chichester, the (only) city in West Sussex | JM | 11/08/’2411/08/2024 00:49:49 | 29/09/’2429/09/2024 14:33:46 |
| chill on the kidneys | n | A gloriously specific non-specific ailment you are sure to contract should you go outside between October and April [UK] with your shirt untucked from your waistband | Mum | 29/10/’2329/10/2023 00:32:56 | – |
| chilli gone barmy | n | Chilli con carne | King family | 27/07/’2127/07/2021 21:31:18 | – |
| chilly bin | n | Portable icebox | Clayhoffs (aka Westerdons) | 20/01/’2320/01/2023 00:58:28 | – |
| chocolate board | n | The rear boarding platform of a bus, specifically of the AEC Regent Three | Mark | 21/11/’2121/11/2021 14:18:31 | 05/12/’2105/12/2021 12:41:57 |
| chumpney | n | Chutney | Mark | 20/10/’2420/10/2024 01:16:22 | 20/10/’2420/10/2024 12:57:45 |
| chutney | n | Lightning | Sally | 07/04/’2107/04/2021 21:44:58 | 08/04/’2108/04/2021 09:33:19 |
| cigar-shaped aluminum tube in the sky | n | Aeroplane | Pa | 07/01/’2407/01/2024 23:27:19 | – |
| city of screaming tyres | n | Oxford | Mum | 11/08/’2411/08/2024 00:58:01 | 21/10/’2421/10/2024 15:09:13 |
| Claypots | n | Nickname of the Claydon family | Clare | 11/02/’2411/02/2024 00:40:48 | – |
| Cla’am | n | Gentrified pronunciation of the London district Clapham | Brian | 25/05/’2125/05/2021 15:27:27 | 08/12/’2408/12/2024 13:33:58 |
| cleveh | adj | Clever in a rather smug sort of way | Mark | 15/03/’2315/03/2023 12:31:07 | – |
| clever people like me who talk loudly in restaurants | exp | Expression of disapproval of people who talk loudly in restaurants | M & N | 11/08/’2111/08/2021 00:28:35 | 14/12/’2414/12/2024 01:34:32 |
| clickage | n | Groceries purchased via a click-and-collect arrangement | M & N | 07/02/’2207/02/2022 14:57:16 | – |
| clootie | n | Left-handed person | Dad | 05/03/’2105/03/2021 14:11:47 | 11/01/’2511/01/2025 13:50:47 |
| cock a deaf ’un | v | Cock a deaf ear; ignore the thing a person has said | Mark | 12/07/’2212/07/2022 01:11:38 | – |
| cock-a-leg | n | Scottish traditional dancing | Mark | 21/01/’2421/01/2024 14:49:48 | – |
| cockpit ape | n | One who drives with an arm resting along the door, in the manner of Clarkson J and Johnson B | Mark | 28/07/’2128/07/2021 18:47:45 | 29/07/’2129/07/2021 11:46:04 |
| Cocoa Banana | n | Copacabana, a district of Rio de Janiero, Brazil, and also the title of a song popularised by the singer Barry Manilow in 1978 | Mark | 21/11/’2421/11/2024 15:42:40 | 26/11/’2426/11/2024 11:31:50 |
| code yellow | exp | A pee, or going for a pee, or in need of a pee | M & N | 25/05/’2125/05/2021 15:32:27 | 10/08/’2110/08/2021 23:34:31 |
| codslaw | n | Coleslaw | Riverbanklings | 27/06/’2527/06/2025 22:37:47 | – |
| coffinated | adj | Sold in a sealed punnet (of food) | M & N | 27/07/’2127/07/2021 21:22:25 | – |
| collapsize | v | Capsize | G | 04/03/’2204/03/2022 15:22:56 | – |
| Columbo bladder | n | The condition, familiar to some older gentlemen, that causes the bladder to suggest one last squirt after the micturiter has shut up shop, washed hands and headed for the door | Mark | 25/05/’2125/05/2021 15:23:46 | 28/01/’2228/01/2022 16:44:01 |
| combine hoover | n | Combine harvester | Iliff family | 11/03/’2111/03/2021 23:37:25 | – |
| come to the cookhouse door, boys! | verse | The meal is ready | King family | 27/05/’2127/05/2021 14:43:52 | 28/02/’2528/02/2025 00:26:44 |
| conkerbox | n | A small, noisy car that rattles and shakes | Mark | 31/08/’2231/08/2022 00:24:46 | 05/09/’2205/09/2022 13:31:55 |
| contrafibularities | n | Congratulations. Can also be used out of context to baffle the hearer | Riverbankers | 24/05/’2524/05/2025 23:43:29 | 24/05/’2524/05/2025 23:43:15 |
| contribute! | exc | Your participation in the conversation must increase | Mum | 10/02/’2210/02/2022 15:21:55 | – |
| contrived delights of LA | n | Los Angeles’s theme parks | M & N | 03/03/’2103/03/2021 23:39:17 | – |
| cooking fat! | exc | By jove, that cat is annoying me | Joy | 02/03/’2102/03/2021 13:30:47 | 28/01/’2228/01/2022 20:48:20 |
| coolth | n | Coolness, in the sense of fashionableness | Mark | 02/01/’2502/01/2025 00:17:33 | 08/01/’2508/01/2025 13:19:10 |
| Coorg’s | n | The American beer Coor’s | Pa | 25/05/’2125/05/2021 15:38:45 | – |
| Copper Pisspot, The | n | The Golden Cross hotel & restaurant in a courtyard off Cornmarket, Oxford | Pa | 07/01/’2407/01/2024 00:31:28 | – |
| Cornish nasty | n | 1) A poorly made Cornish pasty.
2) A Cornish pasty
…depending on your point of view | Mark | 23/03/’2123/03/2021 22:57:27 | – |
| couldn’t organise a black pudding | adj | Scatty, disorganised, bumbling | Granny | 03/03/’2103/03/2021 23:44:22 | – |
| cover it over quick, Jemima! | verse | You are displaying a little more flesh than you might wish | Mum | 08/03/’2108/03/2021 14:13:31 | 05/03/’2205/03/2022 21:56:07 |
| cowp | v | Capsize | John T | 01/07/’2201/07/2022 13:38:19 | – |
| crack the sads | v | To become upset or unhappy, or throw a tantrum | Clare | 12/07/’2212/07/2022 00:59:23 | – |
| crank tea | n | Herbal infusion | Mark | 20/04/’2120/04/2021 23:33:44 | – |
| Crappy Bleater | n | The erstwhile roadside restaurant chain Happy Eater | Mark | 18/01/’2518/01/2025 23:43:14 | – |
| cronky donkey | n | Decrepit railway train, especially an old DMU | Mark | 06/03/’2106/03/2021 15:06:30 | 06/03/’2106/03/2021 15:07:11 |
| crook and nanny | n | Nook and cranny | Iliff family | 20/10/’2420/10/2024 01:08:05 | – |
| crop dusting | v | Letting a fart whilst in motion, particularly indoors | Benno | 27/02/’2227/02/2022 15:01:27 | – |
| crunchy plate | n | Poppadom | Riverbankers | 05/02/’2205/02/2022 21:36:44 | – |
| cuddly tick bird | n | Hand-crafted birthday present for Naomi comprising a long white-bodied, yellow beaked, soft and cuddle-able tick bird, with appallingly prickly feet fashioned out of wire covered in sticky black insulating tape | King family | 01/03/’2201/03/2022 16:09:30 | 01/03/’2201/03/2022 20:05:49 |
| cunkspangle | n | Person of small wit and smaller manners | Mark | 18/03/’2218/03/2022 00:31:21 | 18/03/’2218/03/2022 16:28:04 |
| cunsternoon afterble | exp | Good afternoon, constable | Mark | 04/09/’2104/09/2021 13:31:45 | – |
| curioxity | n | Curiosity | Naomi | 05/05/’2405/05/2024 00:39:35 | 05/05/’2405/05/2024 00:45:40 |
| curtains generation | n | Those who grew up when mental illness was shameful and the only treatment was “pull yourself together” | Mark | 31/10/’2131/10/2021 23:38:27 | 31/10/’2131/10/2021 23:39:48 |
| da hoover’s broke | exp | I’ve broken something and it’s your fault | Riverbankers | 12/02/’2212/02/2022 11:01:42 | – |
| daddy socks | n | A technique of putting on a sock whereby the heel is pulled up through the leg so that the sole can be placed over the foot | Joy | 30/03/’2130/03/2021 00:04:55 | – |
| dance of the bogbrush fairies | n | Dance of the sugar plum fairies from Tchaikovsky’s 1892 ballet The Nutcracker | Naomi | 01/03/’2201/03/2022 15:18:37 | – |
| dangleway | n | London’s Meridian Skyway cable car system (later known as Emirates Air Line¹) that crosses the Thames near the Millennium Dome (later known as O₂ Arena). By extension, any such cable car system | M & N | 05/03/’2205/03/2022 16:06:51 | – |
| de petits pois | n | Two small pears… if your French is as bad as Mark’s was | Mark | 10/04/’2110/04/2021 13:32:39 | 11/04/’2111/04/2021 11:41:18 |
| dead, and never called me mother | exp | General purpose acknowledgement of a tragic circumstance | Naomi | 25/05/’2125/05/2021 21:48:07 | – |
| defillibrator | n | Defibrillator | Mark | 01/07/’2201/07/2022 12:56:34 | – |
| deg | v | Water | Mum | 29/12/’2229/12/2022 14:51:49 | – |
| Déjà Vu | n | Citroën Deux Chevaux (2CV) | M & N | 13/03/’2113/03/2021 16:22:40 | 26/11/’2426/11/2024 16:15:16 |
| delusions of adequacy | n | The mindset of someone attempting to outperform their competence | Mark | 05/02/’2205/02/2022 15:26:22 | 09/02/’2209/02/2022 10:10:56 |
| Depeche Mode | n | The retailer Decathlon | Naomi | 06/07/’2106/07/2021 14:48:21 | – |
| der dee twiddly, dee twiddly, dee botty-cracks | exp | We have reached the end of this book/film/TV series | Naomi | 12/03/’2112/03/2021 15:24:15 | 12/03/’2112/03/2021 16:11:14 |
| dere ’tis! | exc | After many hours’ travel towards the seaside, there at last is the actual sea! | G | 19/03/’2119/03/2021 15:45:32 | 19/03/’2119/03/2021 22:49:59 |
| desecrated coconut | n | Dessicated coconut | Naomi | 29/07/’2129/07/2021 12:20:48 | 27/08/’2327/08/2023 23:11:26 |
| dial, face, mug, pan or mat | n | Face | Mark | 07/11/’2207/11/2022 00:25:07 | – |
| dick doc | n | Urologist | Mark | 18/01/’2518/01/2025 23:43:16 | – |
| did you go to a christian boarding school? | exp | You appear to eat very quickly | Evelyn | 20/10/’2420/10/2024 01:11:32 | 20/10/’2420/10/2024 01:31:19 |
| diddle diddle dumpling, mice and John | verse | Diddle diddle dumpling, my son John
…the nursery rhyme | G | 26/05/’2126/05/2021 12:22:12 | 12/11/’2212/11/2022 14:06:50 |
| didn’t want it ANYway! | exp | Said when irreversibly deprived of something, particularly if through one’s own actions | Jeremy | 01/03/’2201/03/2022 16:12:37 | 01/03/’2201/03/2022 16:17:25 |
| dirty bone | n | The remains of a roast joint, or fowl, with enough meat remaining to produce a broth when boiled | Dad | 02/01/’2502/01/2025 00:17:07 | 13/01/’2513/01/2025 19:49:12 |
| disgusterous | adj | Disgusting | Riverbankers | 21/03/’2121/03/2021 22:24:47 | – |
| do a Thomas | v | Race out to the loo in the middle of a meal to make room for more food | Clayhoffs (aka Westerdons) | 08/03/’2208/03/2022 21:14:17 | – |
| do I have to eat the beak? | exp | (No real meaning – just a bonding cry) | M & N | 06/11/’2106/11/2021 12:55:06 | – |
| do it self! | exc | I firmly decline your offer of help | JM | 04/03/’2104/03/2021 12:35:03 | 04/03/’2104/03/2021 12:35:45 |
| do not the gate | exp | Don’t obstruct the gate | Mark | 23/11/’2123/11/2021 22:56:41 | – |
| do you want me to write a letter? | exp | Mum’s response to an offspring complaining about unfairness or strife at school, and later at work | Mum | 07/11/’2107/11/2021 23:14:01 | – |
| doit | v | Lose mental acuity (in the demotic: go ga-ga) | M & N | 27/02/’2327/02/2023 13:14:11 | 08/11/’2408/11/2024 12:26:56 |
| don fly! | exc | Be gone, flying insect! | Mark | 21/03/’2121/03/2021 14:40:12 | – |
| donkey manure | exp | An utterance of deniable disrespect for Afrikaaners | Mark | 06/09/’2306/09/2023 13:21:23 | – |
| donkeys | n | The key of D major | Riverbankers | 02/03/’2202/03/2022 22:51:35 | 02/03/’2202/03/2022 23:08:06 |
| don’t bandy legs with me | exp | Don’t quibble | Riverbankers | 06/03/’2206/03/2022 23:35:59 | – |
| doobry | n | Thingummy. Doohickey. Item that need not be named because it is identified by the context.
Can also be used when the speaker can’t recall the name of an item | Jeremy | 25/11/’2325/11/2023 13:47:07 | 25/11/’2325/11/2023 13:57:02 |
| dots | n | A musical score | Mark | 10/03/’2210/03/2022 18:15:34 | – |
| Douglas Badger | n | The WW2 fighter ace and hero Douglas Bader | Mark | 17/07/’2217/07/2022 00:41:54 | – |
| down the red lane! | exp | Eat your food, child! | Dad | 23/11/’2323/11/2023 23:24:12 | – |
| downside up | adj | Upside down | Dad | 05/02/’2205/02/2022 15:30:37 | – |
| Dr Thos | n | A particular hot water bottle at Shelford | King family | 21/01/’2421/01/2024 01:16:26 | – |
| Draconia | n | Fabled land of uncompromising law and order | Riverbankers | 28/02/’2328/02/2023 22:27:10 | 19/08/’2319/08/2023 12:27:51 |
| Dracyalcrab | n | Barclaycard, the former branding of Barclay’s Bank’s credit card | Naomi | 02/01/’2502/01/2025 00:15:11 | 01/01/’2501/01/2025 23:35:07 |
| drafty draft | n | Precursor to a draft (of documents) | Mark | 29/07/’2129/07/2021 11:49:43 | – |
| dressed in the dark | adj | Attired in a slapdash, incoherent or dishevelled manner | M & N | 11/01/’2511/01/2025 23:48:35 | – |
| dry as a Nullarbor rabbit | adj | Thirsty | Win | 27/02/’2227/02/2022 14:43:26 | 28/02/’2228/02/2022 14:50:10 |
| ducklings | n | Collective term for various waifs and strays in one’s life | The Triskele | 12/02/’2412/02/2024 15:19:02 | 12/02/’2412/02/2024 16:16:15 |
| dudu | n | Insect or bug | King family | 21/03/’2121/03/2021 14:41:59 | – |
| dudu maki | n | Insect repellent | Clare | 04/03/’2204/03/2022 16:25:12 | – |
| dumsey-whumnuts | adj | Rough, uneven, pitted (of roads) | Mark | 24/02/’2124/02/2021 23:25:08 | 07/04/’2107/04/2021 21:54:45 |
| dunny diver | n | Plumber | Win | 27/02/’2227/02/2022 14:45:56 | – |
| dusty end | n | The part of a violin’s fingerboard closer to the bridge than to the nut, where non-classical players rarely venture | Mark | 04/09/’2104/09/2021 13:00:19 | 13/01/’2513/01/2025 19:51:21 |
| E-Type punt | n | Camping punt | M & N | 03/03/’2203/03/2022 14:11:02 | – |
| earbash | n | A verbal harangue | Clayhoffs (aka Westerdons) | 07/11/’2207/11/2022 00:57:18 | – |
| early to rise, early to bed, makes a man healthy, wealthy and dead | exp | Laudable counterproposition to the smug drivel with which larks try to top it the nob over owls | Riverbankers | 28/02/’2528/02/2025 00:42:15 | 10/02/’2510/02/2025 10:19:40 |
| early-onset rigor mortis | n | The aches and pains of old age | Mark | 20/10/’2420/10/2024 01:14:59 | – |
| East Ham | adj | Mad | M & N | 21/03/’2221/03/2022 00:50:21 | 26/10/’2426/10/2024 13:33:59 |
| EBI | adj | Even better if… | Mark | 03/03/’2203/03/2022 14:00:06 | 13/12/’2413/12/2024 22:34:27 |
| ecilop | n | Police | Mark | 01/03/’2201/03/2022 15:01:32 | 21/10/’2421/10/2024 15:18:38 |
| effluent | n | Elephant | Riverbankers | 05/02/’2205/02/2022 21:41:46 | – |
| eh bien, merde alors | exp | Never mind, let’s move on | Mark | 15/11/’2215/11/2022 20:33:54 | – |
| eh wallah | exp | Appears equivalent to “and there you have it” | Mark | 21/11/’2121/11/2021 13:59:46 | 19/01/’2419/01/2024 11:16:21 |
| elderflosh | n | Elderflower cordial | Naomi | 19/03/’2119/03/2021 15:17:39 | – |
| elephant paper | n | Kitchen roll | Iliff family | 03/03/’2103/03/2021 15:08:27 | 26/01/’2226/01/2022 11:21:26 |
| elephants and teaspoons | exp | Callback to the motivational phrase “How do you eat an elephant with a teaspoon? One spoon at a time” | Mark | 17/07/’2217/07/2022 00:53:11 | 19/07/’2219/07/2022 23:52:32 |
| elsan position | n | An inelegant skiing posture remininscent of squatting upon a lavatory | JM | 17/07/’2217/07/2022 00:32:39 | 17/07/’2217/07/2022 00:33:08 |
| elsh | n | Elephant dung | King family | 08/03/’2108/03/2021 14:03:05 | 01/03/’2201/03/2022 16:04:28 |
| emPHAHsis on the wrong syllAHble | exp | Emphasis on the wrong syllable | Naomi | 04/03/’2204/03/2022 15:30:33 | – |
| empty sugar bags | exp | What couples actually say when they whisper sweet nothings | Naomi | 27/05/’2127/05/2021 14:53:12 | – |
| encambula | n | Ambulance | Mark | 30/03/’2130/03/2021 00:10:29 | 14/08/’2414/08/2024 10:45:00 |
| enough blue to make a pair of sailor’s trousers | exp | The sky might appear grey from horizon to horizon, but if you look carefully there are patches of blue | Granny | 02/04/’2402/04/2024 16:13:11 | 02/04/’2402/04/2024 18:20:33 |
| envelote | n | Envelope | Joy | 30/03/’2130/03/2021 21:08:34 | 30/03/’2130/03/2021 21:11:35 |
| epoophany | n | A paradigm-shifting thought, reached while sitting upon the throne | Gareth | 12/03/’2112/03/2021 15:12:44 | 12/03/’2112/03/2021 16:16:40 |
| esky | n | Insulated food carrier | Rob | 19/12/’2419/12/2024 12:15:13 | 19/12/’2419/12/2024 12:19:09 |
| esky wallah | n | One who delivers hot meals to homes | Rob | 19/12/’2419/12/2024 12:18:32 | 19/12/’2419/12/2024 13:15:02 |
| espikkin wahds a weezdum | exp | Bonding cry | Iliff family | 26/07/’2426/07/2024 21:01:49 | 07/11/’2407/11/2024 12:36:36 |
| Eugene One-Gin | n | Евгений Онегин, the young dandy from St Petersberg featured in Pushkin’s novel & Tchaikovsky’s opera Eugene Onegin | Mark | 02/04/’2402/04/2024 18:16:56 | – |
| everybody’s got to be somewhere | exp | Response to “What are you doing here?” | M & N | 30/07/’2330/07/2023 23:53:39 | 30/07/’2330/07/2023 23:54:54 |
| extinguished | adj | Distinguished | King family | 25/03/’2125/03/2021 17:07:21 | 25/03/’2125/03/2021 17:08:46 |
| eye in a sling | exp | Non-specific potential serious injury | Uncle Tony | 04/04/’2504/04/2025 23:49:41 | – |
| eyes like pissholes in the snow | exp | Deeply sunken and/or dark eyes, often preceived to be a symptom of a hangover | Francis | 20/10/’2420/10/2024 01:04:22 | 21/10/’2421/10/2024 12:07:19 |
| Fabrézé | n | The stench suppressant Fabreze | M & N | 08/03/’2208/03/2022 20:34:36 | 26/10/’2426/10/2024 13:40:16 |
| Fairy Nuff | exp | Fair enough. I acknowledge the validity of your position. I concede the point | M & N | 06/03/’2206/03/2022 23:23:22 | 30/11/’2430/11/2024 11:13:57 |
| fall over blackwards | exp | Positive discrimination taken to extremes | Pa | 16/05/’2116/05/2021 23:26:09 | – |
| fart young smeller | n | Smart young feller | Dad | 05/03/’2105/03/2021 14:13:33 | – |
| fartidoodalus | n | One who messes around, or exhibits lack of focus and determination | Granny | 27/07/’2127/07/2021 21:29:20 | – |
| fast thinking walk | n | A solo walk | Riverbankers | 12/07/’2212/07/2022 12:50:07 | 03/07/’2403/07/2024 12:42:24 |
| Father Twiss-Twiss | n | Saint Nicholas / Santa Claus / Père Noël / Father Christmas | Mark | 29/12/’2229/12/2022 15:14:21 | – |
| feak & weeble | adj | Weak and feeble | Iliff family | 20/10/’2420/10/2024 01:05:39 | – |
| festive gooch | n | The period between Christmas & New Year when almost the whole of UK is on holiday | Felix | 06/01/’2406/01/2024 23:54:34 | 18/01/’2518/01/2025 23:17:57 |
| FHB | exp | Family Hold Back, a reminder at parties to let guests have a good crack at the nosh before piling in | Mum | 21/11/’2121/11/2021 01:12:02 | – |
| fiat lux, a remark attributed to God | exp | Let there be light | Mark | 12/03/’2112/03/2021 18:06:59 | – |
| Fiddlywaxeye | n | Imaginary third person when sharing something out between two people – the person counting out ends up with ⅔ and their good-natured companion with ⅓ | Granny | 11/03/’2111/03/2021 23:44:11 | – |
| fimsy | n | Gentle fun wordplay | The Triskele | 12/02/’2412/02/2024 14:05:31 | 12/02/’2412/02/2024 15:04:04 |
| fin de saison | adj | Unwelcoming, with many facilities closed | Mum | 13/05/’2213/05/2022 01:21:10 | – |
| fire eng truck | n | Fire engine | Benno | 30/03/’2130/03/2021 21:06:35 | – |
| fissle | v | Surreptitously investigate wrapped presents before breakfast on Christmas morning | Mum | 29/12/’2229/12/2022 14:49:28 | 05/04/’2505/04/2025 13:17:57 |
| fizzy knitting | n | Overhead powerlines, particularly those for trolleybuses & trams | Mark | 13/03/’2313/03/2023 17:03:59 | 12/01/’2512/01/2025 12:43:29 |
| flaming brandinis | n | Game that involves pouring flaming brandy over a bowl of raisins and eating them while they’re still burning | Bel | 04/05/’2204/05/2022 00:22:16 | 04/05/’2204/05/2022 14:19:19 |
| flappy meats | n | Cooked meats, charcuterie, cold cuts | M & N | 04/03/’2204/03/2022 15:21:23 | – |
| flappy plate | n | Flour tortilla | Mark | 20/03/’2120/03/2021 21:09:29 | – |
| flappyfishogram | n | Echocardiogram, an ultrasound scan of the heart | Riverbankers | 29/07/’2129/07/2021 12:17:49 | – |
| flaptop | n | Laptop computer | Mark | 29/12/’2229/12/2022 15:11:03 | – |
| flat out, like a lizard drinking | adj | Flat out | Win | 27/02/’2227/02/2022 14:41:27 | 22/11/’2322/11/2023 16:03:06 |
| flatusphere | n | The hazard zone of a flatus | Mark | 06/03/’2106/03/2021 15:01:23 | – |
| flea rake | n | Hair comb | Win | 28/02/’2228/02/2022 16:10:34 | 28/02/’2228/02/2022 16:11:54 |
| flippin’ ug | adj | Unprepossessing | Mark | 11/01/’2211/01/2022 15:50:44 | – |
| flock of sparrows | n | A particularly satisfying and comprehensive defecation | M & N | 10/07/’2210/07/2022 16:17:08 | – |
| floor sweepings | n | The type of bread so full of roughage that it barely hangs together, and is often understatedly sold as “multigrain” | Mark | 10/07/’2210/07/2022 22:43:08 | – |
| floordrobe | n | The floor of a bedroom when scattered with clothing | Mark | 22/10/’2322/10/2023 00:27:33 | – |
| flopsam & jepsam | n | Flotsam & jetsam | Uncle Tony | 03/03/’2103/03/2021 23:56:08 | – |
| flosh | n | With qualifier: fizzy liquid.
Without qualifier: elderflosh (qv) | Naomi | 19/03/’2119/03/2021 15:19:28 | 20/10/’2420/10/2024 14:49:49 |
| Floss | n | Clare’s pet name for her daughter Eve | Clare | 21/01/’2421/01/2024 01:08:29 | – |
| fluff | v | To break wind | JM | 24/01/’2324/01/2023 23:58:21 | – |
| flutterby | n | Butterfly | Dad | 11/03/’2111/03/2021 23:35:38 | 19/03/’2219/03/2022 22:44:20 |
| fly squatter | n | Fly swatter | Win | 27/02/’2227/02/2022 14:12:46 | – |
| Fodgy | n | Swanage, a Dorset seaside town | Iliff family | 30/09/’2430/09/2024 10:40:29 | 30/09/’2430/09/2024 11:15:10 |
| FOFO | n | A basis for the valuation of stocks (inventory) hard-found by young auditors | Mark | 10/09/’2310/09/2023 12:18:20 | – |
| fok strongbody | adj | Powerful, strong, intense | Mark | 03/03/’2103/03/2021 23:52:19 | 06/03/’2106/03/2021 14:09:59 |
| for Ron | adj | For later on | Mark | 19/08/’2119/08/2021 12:46:19 | 30/10/’2330/10/2023 10:05:04 |
| Forderism | n | A strangled conceit of the kind much employed by Rev H Forder to leaven his sermons | Iliff family | 20/06/’2320/06/2023 16:00:41 | – |
| forgetty bowl of naise | n | Spaghetti bolognaise | Nicholas | 29/03/’2129/03/2021 23:54:12 | – |
| forn prongs | n | Travel adapters for electrical plugs | Mark | 04/03/’2104/03/2021 12:36:39 | 17/12/’2417/12/2024 10:41:43 |
| fost & frog | n | Frost and fog | Iliff family | 13/12/’2413/12/2024 21:10:02 | 13/12/’2413/12/2024 21:55:03 |
| foul infidel! Know you have trod on the toe of Abdul Abulbul Amir! | verse | You have trodden on my foot | Pa | 09/03/’2209/03/2022 16:01:36 | 28/06/’2528/06/2025 09:21:08 |
| fox’s puss | n | Faux pas | Mark | 12/03/’2112/03/2021 18:09:12 | 12/03/’2112/03/2021 18:11:30 |
| fraggleflops | n | A particular kind of shoe, with very little potential as a weapon, issued to prison inmates | Naomi | 25/05/’2125/05/2021 21:44:52 | 05/02/’2205/02/2022 21:32:37 |
| front loader | n | Bra that fastens at the front | Bel | 07/01/’2407/01/2024 23:09:17 | 25/05/’2525/05/2025 10:29:21 |
| full backal | adj | Showing someone’s body naked and from the rear | Mark | 28/02/’2528/02/2025 00:42:00 | 28/02/’2528/02/2025 13:27:51 |
| full-fat electricity | n | Electricity from an electric vehicle rapid charger | Bel | 07/01/’2407/01/2024 00:34:15 | 29/09/’2429/09/2024 15:29:48 |
| fundo-cubital dislocia | n | The condition of being unable to distinguish between one’s arse and one’s elbow, of being clueless | Mark | 25/05/’2125/05/2021 21:32:55 | 08/11/’2408/11/2024 12:42:16 |
| furphy | n | A tall tale. An erroneous or improbable story that is claimed to be factual | Clare | 12/07/’2212/07/2022 00:57:31 | 17/12/’2417/12/2024 12:12:31 |
| fustercluck | n | A mess resulting from several mistakes compounding each other | Mark | 11/03/’2111/03/2021 23:34:23 | – |
| garamasalata | n | The spice blend garam masala | Naomi | 18/01/’2518/01/2025 23:43:15 | – |
| garnsed up | adj | 1) In a tangle
2) Badly soiled | Iliff family | 04/03/’2104/03/2021 12:30:49 | 12/01/’2512/01/2025 12:20:45 |
| gash | adj | Broken.
Can also, in the same general sense, be a noun meaning rubbish | Mark | 07/11/’2107/11/2021 23:25:37 | – |
| gawn awf and gawt lawst | exp | Gone astray | Mark | 26/06/’2326/06/2023 09:27:12 | 10/11/’2410/11/2024 12:25:44 |
| gee what great looking kids – are they adopted? | exp | Intended meaning: Your kids are a lot blonder than you two | M & N | 30/03/’2130/03/2021 21:20:51 | – |
| generation J | n | Baby boomers, those of us who grew up with affordable housing, generous pensions and free university | Mark | 31/10/’2131/10/2021 23:36:05 | – |
| gently, Bentley! | exp | Be more gentle! Slow down! | Mum | 11/01/’2511/01/2025 23:47:57 | – |
| get aht t’road ye silly beggar! | exc | Cease obstructing my passage! | Granny | 27/05/’2127/05/2021 14:22:06 | – |
| get off and milk it! | exp | I am not very impressed with your vehicle | M & N | 17/03/’2117/03/2021 21:08:47 | 11/01/’2211/01/2022 12:39:36 |
| get off home with you! | exc | Your round of golf is spoiling the view from my window | Granny | 08/03/’2108/03/2021 15:49:04 | 08/03/’2108/03/2021 15:49:18 |
| give every flying moment something to remember it by | exp | Response to “I’m bored” | Granny | 10/02/’2210/02/2022 15:17:14 | – |
| glass cherries | n | Glacé cherries | Clare | 27/02/’2227/02/2022 14:37:32 | 28/02/’2228/02/2022 14:52:29 |
| Gnomey Alewife | n | WordPerfect 4.2’s spellcheck suggestion for Naomi Iliff | Mark | 31/08/’2231/08/2022 00:19:03 | – |
| go commando | v | Perform a piece of music without referring to the score | Mark | 18/04/’2218/04/2022 00:22:45 | 28/06/’2528/06/2025 09:44:43 |
| go in the out exit | v | In a building with separate entrance and exit doors, use the wrong one. Drive the wrong way in a car park or other wild space. Go against the established flow | Naomi | 21/11/’2421/11/2024 16:02:25 | 21/11/’2421/11/2024 21:05:02 |
| go swimming with the children | v | Defecate | Naomi | 18/04/’2218/04/2022 00:07:53 | – |
| Goat Herders’ Guide to the Galaxy (or GHGTTG) | n | The christian bible | Mark | 05/12/’2105/12/2021 18:23:51 | 19/12/’2419/12/2024 21:13:06 |
| gobble | v | Ogle. Observe lecherously | Naomi | 21/08/’2321/08/2023 08:47:28 | – |
| god rest you jerry mentlemen | verse | Mischievous variation on God rest you merry, gentlemen from the carol of the same name | Iliff family | 11/02/’2211/02/2022 11:50:12 | 05/03/’2205/03/2022 21:59:57 |
| goggrybaggies | adj | Mouldy, off, rotten (of food) | Naomi | 30/06/’2230/06/2022 22:56:55 | 26/07/’2426/07/2024 16:32:29 |
| Golliwog railway | n | The Festiniog (now Ffestiniog) Railway in N Wales | Francis | 25/05/’2125/05/2021 15:29:05 | – |
| good girl, Daddy | exp | You have my approval, Father | JM | 25/03/’2125/03/2021 12:37:53 | – |
| good moaning | exp | Good morning | Riverbankers | 25/05/’2125/05/2021 15:45:12 | 28/06/’2528/06/2025 09:39:43 |
| goodndit | n | One of the good guys in a story | Mark | 29/07/’2129/07/2021 12:23:53 | – |
| goosegog | n | Gooseberry | Iliff family | 28/01/’2228/01/2022 00:08:54 | – |
| gorillas | n | The key of G major | Riverbankers | 02/03/’2202/03/2022 22:53:28 | 02/03/’2202/03/2022 23:08:40 |
| grabled exnaplation | n | Garbled explanation… but garbled | Mark | 14/03/’2114/03/2021 11:37:55 | – |
| Grauniad | n | The UK-based newspaper The Guardian | M & N | 30/11/’2330/11/2023 08:12:11 | – |
| graunty/gruncle | n | Great aunty / Great uncle | Lyra | 25/03/’2125/03/2021 12:41:17 | 16/12/’2416/12/2024 13:38:33 |
| graveyard cough | n | A cough of such severity that its possessor might not have long to live.
Can also be used hyperbolically to mean simply a bad cough | Evelyn | 19/12/’2419/12/2024 12:40:06 | 19/12/’2419/12/2024 13:15:56 |
| Great Aunt Pottymouth | n | Naomi | Martin | 16/05/’2116/05/2021 23:12:52 | – |
| Grey Funnel Line | n | The navy | Mark | 26/06/’2326/06/2023 09:34:58 | 08/12/’2408/12/2024 13:28:03 |
| Grindelchomps | n | The historian, TV presenter and daughter of Reading Lucy Worsley | Mark | 10/07/’2210/07/2022 16:26:39 | – |
| grouse | adj | Very good | Benno | 25/05/’2125/05/2021 15:30:47 | – |
| gubby | n | Car sporting a GB plate when seen abroad | Mum | 14/03/’2114/03/2021 13:44:45 | 21/02/’2521/02/2025 11:31:26 |
| Gusto | n | A mystery friend | JM | 19/08/’2119/08/2021 12:54:01 | – |
| haddoncave | v | Participate in PE without a jockstrap | Mark | 27/06/’2127/06/2021 15:54:32 | – |
| Hairy Pudder | n | The fictional character Harry Potter | Mark | 17/01/’2217/01/2022 00:00:59 | 23/01/’2223/01/2022 12:40:03 |
| hand in one’s badge and gun | v | Resign | Mark | 30/06/’2230/06/2022 22:59:26 | – |
| hands on – are you ready? – lift! | exp | Chant for cueing coordinated action. Can also be used to coax oneself out of a comfy chair when weary | M & N | 30/11/’2430/11/2024 15:59:50 | 30/11/’2430/11/2024 16:32:57 |
| hankerchoof | n | Handkerchief | Joy | 03/02/’2203/02/2022 15:37:26 | 20/06/’2320/06/2023 16:24:24 |
| Harem Dream | n | Nickname for the aroma of Sure for Men Active Dry deodorant | Felix | 28/02/’2528/02/2025 00:42:03 | – |
| Harwich for the Continent, {Frinton} for the incontinent | exp | Old folk joke from the time when “Harwich for the Continent” would be generally recognised | Pa | 18/08/’2318/08/2023 21:25:35 | 26/08/’2326/08/2023 12:17:49 |
| hat-trick job | n | A formerly shared job that has become the sole responsibility of the person who was foolish enough to undertake it three times running | M & N | 20/10/’2420/10/2024 01:19:29 | 23/10/’2423/10/2024 10:46:34 |
| hatches, matches and despatches | n | The Births, Marriages & Deaths column of a newspaper, the avid perusal of which becomes the first priority of some when it thuds on the mat | Granny | 10/03/’2210/03/2022 18:14:00 | – |
| hatstand | adj | Crazy | Al | 03/12/’2303/12/2023 00:52:41 | – |
| haus sik | n | Hospital | Clare | 02/03/’2202/03/2022 23:12:18 | – |
| have speaks | v | Discuss | Joy | 16/04/’2116/04/2021 14:37:46 | – |
| he seems nice | exp | He seems odious | Riverbankers | 25/01/’2425/01/2024 00:03:38 | – |
| head-canon | n | Information about an intellectual property that is not explicitly in the text but is in one’s head to explain away an inconsistency/fill in a detail | The Triskele | 12/02/’2412/02/2024 14:37:21 | 12/02/’2412/02/2024 16:12:03 |
| helmetball | n | American football | Mark | 05/05/’2405/05/2024 00:26:34 | – |
| here’s a tanner each to go away | exp | Mental reaction to carol singers knocking the door. Can be literal or ironic. Would not actually be voiced | Iliff family | 11/08/’2111/08/2021 00:34:51 | 19/08/’2119/08/2021 12:56:21 |
| hey little horsey, don’t you stop | verse | Call back to the song:
Hey little horsey, don’t you stop,
Just let your hooves go clicketty clop.
Tail go swish, wheels go round
Giddy up we’re homeward bound. | Pa | 08/03/’2208/03/2022 21:50:02 | – |
| hey, Mr Squirrel, pull your pants up! | exp | Callback to a joke that clearly tickled Pa but was never given in full | Pa | 03/09/’2303/09/2023 10:39:07 | – |
| he’s got that round his neck | exp | He has deeply misunderstood and/or perpetrated a severe logical or factual tangle | Mark | 01/03/’2201/03/2022 15:10:41 | 12/11/’2412/11/2024 12:26:06 |
| hiding behind the door when the brains were handed out | adj | Not notably astute | M & N | 06/07/’2106/07/2021 14:52:10 | 28/01/’2228/01/2022 16:36:53 |
| Higwi Kombi | n | High Wycombe | M & N | 20/04/’2120/04/2021 23:35:38 | 20/04/’2120/04/2021 23:36:55 |
| His Majesty’s Lunchbox | n | The retailer Majestic Wines | Naomi | 06/07/’2106/07/2021 14:46:29 | – |
| hodududuh | n | Hand-powered carpet sweeper | Riverbankers | 04/09/’2104/09/2021 12:37:48 | 10/11/’2410/11/2024 12:21:40 |
| hoggry tiglets! | exc | My, what a satisfying ending! | Naomi | 14/03/’2114/03/2021 13:50:32 | – |
| hogwashing hat | n | Impromptu sun hat made by drawing up a t-shirt until the neck band sits round the forehead and the remainder covers the neck | Naomi | 03/03/’2103/03/2021 23:59:28 | – |
| hoist on his/her/your own door-bomb | exp | Hoist on his/her/your own petard. Caught in one’s own trap | Riverbankers | 20/07/’2220/07/2022 00:03:09 | 12/11/’2412/11/2024 12:25:01 |
| hold back my sleeve while I put my finger to my forehead | exp | I am trying to bring a forgotten thing to mind | Pa | 04/03/’2204/03/2022 00:49:36 | 26/11/’2426/11/2024 20:30:43 |
| hollow legs | adj | One capable of eating large amounts of food while remaining slender | Iliff family | 05/02/’2205/02/2022 15:32:02 | – |
| holly bush | n | Mythical physical laxative | Granny | 10/04/’2110/04/2021 13:38:49 | – |
| home again, home again, jiggedy jog | verse | We are finally home! Pa would chant it upon arriving home after an outing with Mr Bump | Pa | 12/03/’2112/03/2021 15:20:12 | 09/03/’2209/03/2022 22:18:56 |
| homeopathic vodka | n | Water | Mark | 27/06/’2127/06/2021 16:09:29 | – |
| honey money | n | Proceeds of selling honey | Clayhoffs (aka Westerdons) | 28/02/’2228/02/2022 16:14:35 | – |
| honker | n | Goose | Joy | 22/02/’2122/02/2021 01:18:44 | 22/02/’2122/02/2021 01:18:44 |
| hoof-hearted | exp | Has the form of an adjective, but is just a surreptitious way of calling out someone else’s flatulence | Granny | 31/10/’2131/10/2021 23:52:26 | 31/10/’2131/10/2021 23:54:07 |
| hopsital | n | Hospital | Riverbanklings | 27/03/’2127/03/2021 15:20:37 | 28/03/’2128/03/2021 15:07:50 |
| hopt out | v | Opt out | Bel | 04/03/’2204/03/2022 15:28:14 | – |
| Horrible Life | n | Herbal Life (now Herbalife), the brand of shampoo & similar products | Iliff family | 12/05/’2112/05/2021 22:19:38 | – |
| Horrids | n | The retail emporium Harrods | Brian | 03/07/’2203/07/2022 12:22:15 | – |
| horse apples | n | Horse shit | M & N | 22/10/’2322/10/2023 00:46:21 | – |
| horse droppings | n | A hairstyle in which the hair is drawn up to sit on top of the head in multiple blobs | Naomi | 21/01/’2421/01/2024 01:28:41 | – |
| horse’s douvers | n | Hors d’oeuvres | Mark | 19/03/’2119/03/2021 15:27:52 | 01/01/’2301/01/2023 11:29:25 |
| hossi van tooty | n | An ambulance siren | Naomi | 05/11/’2405/11/2024 20:53:35 | 08/11/’2408/11/2024 12:53:46 |
| hot bottyflosher | n | Cleansing lavatory of the kind often associated with Japan. Apt to be sold elsewhere as a smart or bidet toilet | M & N | 21/08/’2321/08/2023 08:56:59 | 21/12/’2421/12/2024 00:59:56 |
| hot holders | n | Oven mitts | King family | 21/11/’2121/11/2021 01:10:23 | 11/02/’2211/02/2022 00:49:58 |
| hot will grow cold, if greedy will wait | exp | If you had patience then your mouth would not be burning right now | Granny Collard | 12/03/’2112/03/2021 15:25:44 | 04/03/’2204/03/2022 00:19:26 |
| how awdinawy! | exc | Depressingly dull. Disappointingly ordinary | M & N | 11/03/’2111/03/2021 15:47:51 | 31/10/’2431/10/2024 15:50:12 |
| how’s your belly off for spots? | exp | How are you | Granny | 21/03/’2121/03/2021 15:58:40 | 21/03/’2121/03/2021 22:15:06 |
| hullabaloo | n | One given to loud and/or exhibitionist behaviour, especially when boating | M & N | 31/10/’2131/10/2021 23:43:14 | 01/11/’2101/11/2021 22:10:11 |
| humididity | n | Humidity | M & N | 13/03/’2113/03/2021 22:42:21 | – |
| hyper-bowl | n | Hyperbole | M & N | 17/03/’2117/03/2021 13:31:21 | – |
| hypodemic nerdle | n | Hypodermic needle | M & N | 05/03/’2105/03/2021 13:47:29 | 12/11/’2412/11/2024 12:28:27 |
| I can walk from here | exp | You have parked rather far from the kerb | M & N | 11/02/’2211/02/2022 01:35:50 | – |
| I Clavdivs | n | I, Claudius, the book of Robert Graves | M & N | 29/07/’2129/07/2021 12:31:07 | – |
| I could have cooked at home | exp | Rebuke for anyone who chooses the same dish as someone else at the table when eating out | Mum | 30/11/’2330/11/2023 08:25:06 | – |
| I did not know that death had undone so many | exp | Blimey, what a lot of people! Generally used when caught up in a pressing crowd, or observing a teeming throng | Naomi | 01/07/’2201/07/2022 12:30:52 | 02/01/’2302/01/2023 13:33:35 |
| I don’t boil my cabbages twice | exp | I decline to repeat the words to which you failed to give proper attention | Granny | 04/03/’2104/03/2021 12:38:12 | 24/12/’2124/12/2021 11:34:13 |
| I don’t want to play this game any more | exp | I am fed up with the current situation, or with life | Naomi | 19/12/’2419/12/2024 12:46:07 | – |
| I expect nothing. I fear nothing. I am free. | exp | (What it says) | Naomi | 08/03/’2208/03/2022 21:01:41 | 19/01/’2419/01/2024 11:10:38 |
| I have had an elegant sufficiency | exp | Used when turning down a second (or subsequent) helping at table | Evelyn | 07/01/’2407/01/2024 23:24:31 | 17/03/’2517/03/2025 09:17:31 |
| I have measured out my life with coffee spoons | verse | Can be quoted to mean:
1) I have been engaged in trivia
2) I have drunk a lot of coffee | Naomi | 26/08/’2326/08/2023 00:39:59 | – |
| I laughed until I stopped | exp | I didn’t laugh | M & N | 01/07/’2201/07/2022 12:44:46 | – |
| I lift up my finger and I say tweet tweet | verse | Callback to:
I lift up my finger and I say tweet tweet, shush shush, come come, now now.
I don’t think we ever worked out what prompted a recital… | Granny | 29/12/’2229/12/2022 15:03:05 | 09/01/’2509/01/2025 00:01:38 |
| I love deadlines. I love the whooshing noise they make as they go by | exp | I hate deadlines | Mark | 28/02/’2228/02/2022 15:50:47 | – |
| I need trepanning like a hole in the head | exp | Just a silly thing sometimes said | M & N | 11/01/’2511/01/2025 23:46:54 | 11/01/’2511/01/2025 23:46:48 |
| I only dropped them once | exp | I only destroyed { the item in question } once | Uncle Tony | 27/07/’2127/07/2021 21:45:22 | – |
| I remember being in Scotland | verse | A callback to the song fragment:
I remember being in Scotland
Shooting peas up a nanny goat’s bottom
…to the tune of Men of Harlech | Granny | 25/05/’2125/05/2021 15:50:39 | 05/03/’2205/03/2022 22:02:42 |
| I saw Esau sitting an a seesaw | verse | It was just one of those things grown-ups would come out with from time to time | Granny | 07/01/’2407/01/2024 00:05:20 | 12/11/’2412/11/2024 12:27:08 |
| I see said the blind man as he walked into a lampost | exp | Sceptical response to the assertion “I see” | Iliff family | 05/02/’2205/02/2022 15:23:52 | – |
| I takin’ my sack and my boots | exp | I’ve had enough of this | Carmen | 26/02/’2126/02/2021 21:39:07 | 25/11/’2325/11/2023 18:22:15 |
| I thought we were having a PSA | exp | Polite¹ way of saying “No, we’re not going out and stop making that racket”. PSA = peaceful Sunday afternoon | Bel | 28/02/’2328/02/2023 21:11:49 | 02/03/’2302/03/2023 15:26:20 |
| I thought you were complaining about the bouzouki | exp | I could make no sense of what you just said | M & N | 06/09/’2306/09/2023 13:14:19 | – |
| I wanna beetroot | exc | I really like the look of those toffee apples | John T | 07/03/’2107/03/2021 21:14:05 | – |
| I want gets nothing | exp | Don’t ask for things | Iliff family | 11/08/’2111/08/2021 00:15:48 | 12/01/’2512/01/2025 12:37:05 |
| I want to watch me daddy pee | exp | (What it says) | Iliff family | 15/03/’2115/03/2021 21:35:16 | 15/03/’2115/03/2021 21:36:47 |
| I was a fool to think the old Percy was dead | exp | I find myself amorously inclined | G | 06/09/’2106/09/2021 01:22:07 | 10/09/’2110/09/2021 12:27:34 |
| I would as lief ’erd ‘ens | exp | I don’t want to do it | King family | 04/03/’2204/03/2022 00:53:39 | – |
| idées au dessus de son gare | exp | Ideas above his station, a classic put-down of those trying to advance themselves by those who consider themselves superior | Aunt D | 04/02/’2204/02/2022 13:55:14 | 17/12/’2417/12/2024 17:57:55 |
| idiot check | n | A final check that everything is in order, and that no fool has managed to circumvent foolproof procedures | Joy | 19/12/’2419/12/2024 12:49:55 | 19/12/’2419/12/2024 13:17:01 |
| if he fell into basin full of boobs he’d come out sucking his thumb | exp | He is serially unlucky | M & N | 28/02/’2228/02/2022 15:38:40 | 28/02/’2228/02/2022 21:44:07 |
| if I could walk that way I wouldn’t need the talcum powder | exp | Response to “walk this way” | Riverbankers | 29/12/’2229/12/2022 15:05:55 | – |
| if I wasn’t a gunner I wouldn’t be here | exp | Timing phrase used by the gunner during a gun salute to ensure the bangs are evenly spaced | M & N | 30/06/’2230/06/2022 23:15:10 | – |
| if UCP on tripe don’t eat it | exp | If you see pee on tripe don’t eat it | Uncle Tony | 12/02/’2212/02/2022 11:22:56 | – |
| if you can’t help don’t hinder | exp | Rebuke for an offspring whose attempts to be helpful prove unsuccessful | Mum | 24/04/’2324/04/2023 14:24:26 | – |
| if you can’t trivialise it it’s not worth saying | exp | Don’t treat TV reportage as accurate | Mark | 27/02/’2327/02/2023 12:40:34 | – |
| if you enjoyed it half as much... | exp | Callback to the saying “If you enjoyed it half as much as we did, then we enjoyed it twice as much as you” | Riverbankers | 13/09/’2313/09/2023 15:34:10 | 22/10/’2322/10/2023 10:40:11 |
| if you get there first, draw a chalk line; if I get there first, I’ll rub it out | exp | (Laudable nonsense) | Uncle Tony | 11/03/’2111/03/2021 15:56:05 | 11/03/’2111/03/2021 16:19:19 |
| if you have been, thank you for listening | exp | Customary end-of-gig sign-off of Simon Nicol, guitarist and founding member of the band Fairport Convention | Mark | 12/07/’2212/07/2022 13:23:59 | 15/07/’2215/07/2022 10:25:17 |
| if you’re up that way with your teeth | exp | If you will be going anyway | Joy | 09/03/’2109/03/2021 16:33:57 | 21/01/’2521/01/2025 00:49:05 |
| Ikea name | n | A person’s first name modified in a particular way | Mark | 24/01/’2324/01/2023 23:23:17 | 11/01/’2511/01/2025 13:53:19 |
| Iliff Point | n | The remotest part of a beach, where we would go to be away from everyone else (even though it meant lugging everything miles from the car) | Iliff family | 03/03/’2103/03/2021 13:20:18 | 11/03/’2111/03/2021 16:11:43 |
| Iliff Wight | n | Isle of Wight, a county of England | G | 03/03/’2103/03/2021 13:16:27 | 21/01/’2221/01/2022 11:08:43 |
| imaginary friend | n | A god | Mark | 13/09/’2313/09/2023 15:28:12 | 12/01/’2512/01/2025 12:25:26 |
| in all my born days | adv | Ever | Dad | 18/08/’2318/08/2023 22:15:11 | – |
| in days gone by | adv | In the past | Dad | 18/08/’2318/08/2023 22:13:56 | 18/08/’2318/08/2023 22:15:24 |
| in heated agreement | adj | When people are arguing vehemently for their own point of view without realising that they coincide | Mark | 10/07/’2210/07/2022 16:22:18 | – |
| in the beginning there was nothing, which exploded | exp | Succinct and accurate summary of the Big Bang | Riverbankers | 30/11/’2430/11/2024 16:02:58 | 04/12/’2404/12/2024 10:54:10 |
| in the nothings | adj | Naked | King family | 19/03/’2219/03/2022 15:48:04 | 30/03/’2230/03/2022 01:01:01 |
| include me out | exp | I do not wish to participate in this activity, thank you | Dad | 23/11/’2323/11/2023 23:28:08 | – |
| insa fishy tarn o’ da coont | exp | I could make no sense of what they just said | Mark | 30/09/’2430/09/2024 11:08:43 | 14/10/’2414/10/2024 13:40:59 |
| insult | v | Consult | King family | 07/11/’2107/11/2021 23:28:32 | – |
| is it not passing fair to be a King and ride in triumph through Persepolis? | exp | I am pleased | Pa | 11/09/’2311/09/2023 15:12:29 | 12/09/’2312/09/2023 12:42:42 |
| is that it? Your joke of the week? | exp | Tell better jokes | M & N | 19/12/’2419/12/2024 12:51:28 | – |
| it gives me the pip | exp | I find it annoying or irritating | Granny | 31/03/’2531/03/2025 00:29:13 | 31/03/’2531/03/2025 11:39:26 |
| it has a better chance now | exp | The mistake that prevented a thing from working has now been rectified | Mark | 05/12/’2105/12/2021 15:48:17 | – |
| it was in the last place I looked | exp | I’ve found it | M & N | 29/01/’2229/01/2022 00:42:49 | – |
| it’s a fair cop, but society is to blame | exp | I accept responsibility. It’s a fair cop. You have me bang to rights | M & N | 06/11/’2406/11/2024 23:15:05 | – |
| it’s been a bad year for Scottish hill farmers | exp | (Intended as a conversation stopper) | M & N | 29/01/’2229/01/2022 14:51:12 | 29/01/’2229/01/2022 14:51:51 |
| it’s just an if-statement | exp | Satirical take on people who expect software to perform miracles without having the first idea of what’s involved | Mark | 30/11/’2330/11/2023 08:34:31 | – |
| it’s no skin off my teeth | exp | I am not affected by this | M & N | 04/09/’2104/09/2021 12:55:58 | – |
| it’s not rocket surgery | exp | It’s not difficult | Riverbankers | 08/10/’2208/10/2022 01:13:53 | 08/11/’2408/11/2024 12:46:22 |
| it’s only a trifle said the monkey | exp | Callback to:
”It’s only a trifle!” said the monkey as it peed onto the sponge fingers
…an expression of disdain for the gallimaufric pudding known as a trifle | Dad | 26/12/’2126/12/2021 21:19:13 | – |
| it’s only me Naymee! | exp | I am exercising my self-conferred right to enter your house without an invitation | Naomi | 27/02/’2127/02/2021 16:12:24 | – |
| it’s the water | exp | Expression of disdain for mass-market American beers | Pa | 25/05/’2125/05/2021 15:36:31 | 12/01/’2512/01/2025 12:35:15 |
| it’s worse than the ticktolleroo | exp | A little less fidgeting please | Granny | 07/04/’2107/04/2021 21:38:23 | 07/03/’2207/03/2022 00:27:45 |
| I’ll give you jingle jangle! | exp | I shall deal harshly with any further recalcitrance | Mark | 21/11/’2421/11/2024 16:18:14 | 22/11/’2422/11/2024 10:44:35 |
| I’ll have the other half now | exp | Perhaps I could be persuaded to a little more beer | Dad | 19/03/’2119/03/2021 15:59:23 | 08/01/’2208/01/2022 14:48:02 |
| I’ll raise a bunion on his Spanish onion | verse | I shall have my revenge, in a sort of easy-going way | Granny | 27/01/’2227/01/2022 23:56:32 | 05/03/’2205/03/2022 22:04:01 |
| I’m as old as my tongue and a little bit older than my teeth | exp | Answer to the question “How old are you?” | Granny | 29/01/’2229/01/2022 14:38:47 | – |
| I’m taking it back | exp | Granny’s almost invariable declaration on arriving home with a purchase | Granny | 19/03/’2219/03/2022 15:22:49 | – |
| I’ve got my big eating hat on! | exp | Settle down, stop this noise/disagreement/kerfuffle | Uncle Percy | 13/03/’2113/03/2021 22:48:27 | – |
| jagular | n | Jaguar – can apply both to panthera onca and to the car brand | Riverbankers | 19/03/’2219/03/2022 16:01:28 | 30/09/’2430/09/2024 10:27:26 |
| jam sandwich | n | Police car | M & N | 13/04/’2113/04/2021 13:12:23 | – |
| Japanese jibble-jobs | n | The sweet, savoury & crunchy party snack otherwise known (in UK at least) as Oriental Mix | Mark | 20/06/’2320/06/2023 16:10:58 | 20/06/’2320/06/2023 16:12:18 |
| Jesus, Mary, Joseph and the wee donkey! | exc | Oh for goodness’ sake! An expression of exasperation | M & N | 28/07/’2428/07/2024 14:47:20 | – |
| Jo-Jo le Plongeur | n | The children’s bath toy Diver Dan | Riverbankers | 03/03/’2203/03/2022 14:05:42 | – |
| jock | v | Miss, skip, cut or otherwise fail to attend | Mark | 11/02/’2211/02/2022 12:00:24 | – |
| Joe Blake | n | Snake | Clayhoffs (aka Westerdons) | 04/03/’2204/03/2022 15:56:47 | – |
| jolly hockey sticks | adj | Of school-age girls: Enthusiastic participant in sports, and in upholding unquestioningly the school’s stated values – not necessarily used admiringly | Mum | 10/07/’2210/07/2022 16:12:11 | 22/12/’2422/12/2024 11:51:29 |
| kabiss | n | Cabbage | Clare | 09/03/’2209/03/2022 22:37:50 | – |
| Kahula | n | The coffee-flavoured alcohol more commonly known as Kahlúa | Joy | 12/02/’2412/02/2024 13:33:48 | 29/09/’2429/09/2024 15:17:34 |
| katsik | n | A dish Clare invented consisting largely of baked tomato with feta cubes | Clayhoffs (aka Westerdons) | 27/02/’2227/02/2022 14:18:57 | 27/02/’2227/02/2022 14:24:02 |
| kelp | adj | Happy to go with the flow | The Triskele | 12/02/’2412/02/2024 15:09:19 | 12/02/’2412/02/2024 16:12:49 |
| Kensington Village Hall | n | The Royal Albert Hall (RAH) in London | Riverbanklings | 20/10/’2420/10/2024 00:34:35 | 21/10/’2421/10/2024 12:12:12 |
| kettle | n | Steam locomotive | M & N | 12/11/’2312/11/2023 00:32:25 | – |
| King Midas has ass’s ears | exp | The sound of rustling grasses | King family | 24/01/’2324/01/2023 23:47:04 | 22/10/’2322/10/2023 11:33:14 |
| kiss me WHAT‽ | exp | G’s reaction on being told we were off to the West End to see the musical Kiss Me Kate | G | 19/03/’2219/03/2022 16:06:56 | – |
| kiwi | n | Kilowatt-hour (kWh), the usual unit for measuring energy production, storage and consumption at the individual/household level | Mark | 24/04/’2324/04/2023 14:18:36 | 17/12/’2417/12/2024 12:32:58 |
| knicker picker | n | Picnic | Clayhoffs (aka Westerdons) | 20/01/’2320/01/2023 00:50:26 | – |
| knock it on the head | exp | A suggestion by Dad’s consultant for dealing with a UTI | Dad | 16/03/’2116/03/2021 14:16:16 | 18/12/’2418/12/2024 21:36:44 |
| kom bibi, bibi! | exp | Swiss German summoning cry for chickens, to be yelled at a high pitch and volume when serving them household scraps | King family | 07/01/’2407/01/2024 23:45:41 | – |
| Krapy Rubsnif | n | Finsbury Park, a district of London | Mark | 30/06/’2230/06/2022 23:02:15 | 12/11/’2312/11/2023 00:33:05 |
| kumu | n | Greens (as in green vegetables) | Clare | 21/01/’2421/01/2024 15:09:03 | 21/03/’2521/03/2025 20:59:00 |
| kwinoa | n | Phonetic pronunciation of Quinoa | Mark | 22/10/’2322/10/2023 00:32:21 | – |
| ky-oo Daddy! | exc | On second thoughts, Father, I should like to take up your offer to carry me | JM | 03/03/’2103/03/2021 13:52:37 | – |
| ladies of negotiable affection | n | Female sex workers | Riverbankers | 07/02/’2207/02/2022 14:52:02 | 07/02/’2207/02/2022 14:55:30 |
| lah-pom | n | Lavatory | Dad | 09/03/’2109/03/2021 00:07:15 | – |
| land of hopeless Tories | verse | Line to be sung to the tune of Elgar’s jingoistic roundelay Land of hope and glory | Mum | 07/01/’2407/01/2024 00:37:14 | 08/01/’2408/01/2024 09:53:18 |
| lapsang shoepong | n | The tea variety lapsang souchong | Naomi | 26/07/’2426/07/2024 21:03:41 | 29/07/’2429/07/2024 12:57:10 |
| law of diminishing astonishment | n | The process by which we become less and less impressed by ever greater advances, especially in technology | Mark | 05/12/’2105/12/2021 15:37:06 | – |
| laxadaisical | adj | Like lackadaisical, but laxer | Naomi | 28/07/’2128/07/2021 18:45:10 | 28/07/’2128/07/2021 18:45:38 |
| le chien retourne a son propre vomissement | exp | The dog returns to its own vomit | Naomi | 19/07/’2119/07/2021 23:52:47 | 29/07/’2129/07/2021 12:43:10 |
| le grand fromage lui-même | exp | The big cheese himself | M & N | 19/07/’2119/07/2021 23:57:10 | 12/01/’2512/01/2025 12:48:15 |
| le très chose | n | Just the thing I was seeking | Mark | 18/08/’2318/08/2023 22:18:12 | – |
| leaf blower | n | A well-to-do man who is dissolute or promiscuous | M & N | 12/02/’2212/02/2022 21:23:10 | – |
| leave it to cook | exp | Said while waiting for digital data to download/transfer | G | 07/01/’2407/01/2024 23:11:45 | 07/01/’2407/01/2024 23:12:57 |
| left hand down a bit | exp | A navigation direction given when unsure, or to suggest that the navigator is unsure | Iliff family | 29/10/’2329/10/2023 00:41:10 | – |
| Lesbianese | adj | Lebanese | Riverbankers | 31/03/’2531/03/2025 00:27:12 | 14/04/’2514/04/2025 08:03:58 |
| let it cuik! | exp | If you have an infected bite or splinter, or a boil or carbuncle, put a plaster on and let it take its course | King family | 21/01/’2421/01/2024 14:35:06 | – |
| let my son have the ball! | exc | Veiled threat to embarrass an offspring by intervening on their behalf in something they ought to have under control | Granny | 22/03/’2122/03/2021 23:32:40 | 23/03/’2123/03/2021 22:44:54 |
| Lethal Festival | n | The Leith Hill Musical Festival | Mark | 27/05/’2127/05/2021 21:18:12 | – |
| let’s find out, shall we? | exp | Response to “do you know what you’re doing?” | M & N | 25/01/’2425/01/2024 00:05:22 | 08/11/’2408/11/2024 12:37:52 |
| let’s put the roof on first | exp | Let’s do a thing that due reflection would reveal to be impossible | Iliff family | 06/09/’2106/09/2021 00:57:20 | – |
| Li Phook | n | The East Asian village in Hampshire otherwise known as Liphook | Mark | 01/01/’2301/01/2023 00:44:17 | – |
| lie like a flatfish | v | Tell extreme lies | Mark | 02/03/’2102/03/2021 00:29:14 | 12/01/’2212/01/2022 14:43:29 |
| light a candle to Saint Anthony | exp | A thing to do when searching for a lost item | Pa | 18/03/’2218/03/2022 00:26:37 | – |
| like a goanna up a gum tree | adj | Disappearing fast | Clare | 27/09/’2227/09/2022 23:59:27 | – |
| like Lot’s wife | adj | Emerging profusely (of salt) | Granny | 17/07/’2217/07/2022 01:07:38 | 17/07/’2217/07/2022 21:44:46 |
| like the fat lady – all behind | exp | In arrears or running late | Clare | 27/02/’2327/02/2023 12:10:00 | – |
| limerish | n | Limerick that doesn’t quite follow the rules of that verse form | Mark | 11/08/’2111/08/2021 00:03:52 | – |
| listen to the silence! | exc | Isn’t it quiet? | Granny | 19/03/’2119/03/2021 15:24:03 | – |
| little birdie flying high | verse | A callback to this ditty:
Little birdie flying high
Drops a present from the sky
Angry farmer wipes his eye
Thanking god that cows don’t fly | Uncle Tony | 12/05/’2112/05/2021 21:56:30 | 05/03/’2205/03/2022 22:05:07 |
| little teapots have big spouts | exp | Let us continue this discussion later, when the children aren’t listening | Mum | 26/02/’2126/02/2021 21:36:35 | – |
| Liztrak | n | The Elizabeth Line, the west ⇌ east cross-London rail service | Mark | 03/12/’2303/12/2023 00:29:53 | 03/12/’2303/12/2023 00:41:25 |
| lobster pop | n | Lobster pot | King family | 17/09/’2117/09/2021 21:44:49 | – |
| loggy sticks | n | Logistics | Riverbankers | 17/03/’2117/03/2021 13:10:30 | – |
| long may your big jib draw | exp | Wishing you a happy and successful life | Iliff family | 19/03/’2219/03/2022 15:19:13 | 20/03/’2220/03/2022 01:31:14 |
| longhetti | n | Spaghetti (see Notes) | Iliff family | 08/03/’2108/03/2021 15:54:41 | 11/02/’2211/02/2022 00:48:36 |
| longwe liklik | exp | I have no idea how far away | Clare | 28/02/’2228/02/2022 16:23:24 | – |
| Lontink | n | London | Pa | 25/11/’2325/11/2023 13:43:08 | – |
| looks like you’ve been working on it for eight hours | exc | Forthright critique of a hair-do that’s closer to a hair-don’t | Nathan | 29/12/’2129/12/2021 21:19:09 | – |
| Lord Jesus hangs on a peg. Which peg does he hang on? | exp | Deeply philosophical question posed by Felix aged about 6 when hanging a pine cone on the Christmas tree | Felix | 24/04/’2324/04/2023 15:05:24 | 24/04/’2324/04/2023 15:07:23 |
| lubricants | n | Pedestrians who unwittingly help motorists exit a side road by using a crossing on the main road | M & N | 30/07/’2330/07/2023 23:16:11 | 30/07/’2330/07/2023 23:16:40 |
| lumps | n | Mumps | Iliff family | 21/03/’2121/03/2021 22:34:52 | – |
| lumpy ming fruit | n | Beetroot | Felix | 08/03/’2108/03/2021 19:05:22 | 08/03/’2108/03/2021 19:06:06 |
| Ma son’s a prawn | n | The traditional fiddle tune Mason’s apron | Mark | 18/08/’2318/08/2023 15:36:01 | – |
| made-up-alin | n | Generic term for substances unknown to science that advertisers believe will make toiletries and cosmetics irresistible | Mark | 02/01/’2502/01/2025 00:14:35 | 01/01/’2501/01/2025 23:33:27 |
| madman in the attic | exp | Negotiating technique along the lines of “I’d love to do that but the boss won’t let me” | Mark | 03/03/’2203/03/2022 14:25:51 | 03/03/’2203/03/2022 16:10:14 |
| maflingo | n | Flamingo | Riverbankers | 05/02/’2205/02/2022 21:40:30 | 05/02/’2205/02/2022 21:42:18 |
| Maggie Murphy’s please park prettily | exp | You can park better than that | Uncle Tony | 07/02/’2207/02/2022 14:40:07 | – |
| make friends in cookhouse | exp | Treat support workers with respect | Pa | 23/04/’2123/04/2021 23:09:44 | 26/11/’2426/11/2024 16:22:09 |
| makes your eyebrows sweat | exp | An unexpected consequence of eating blackcurrants | G | 05/03/’2105/03/2021 14:08:55 | 06/03/’2106/03/2021 12:53:43 |
| man is not lost | exp | I have arrived where I intended to. Mr Bump has not failed me | Pa | 28/01/’2528/01/2025 01:25:36 | – |
| manchester | n | Household linen | Riverbankers | 22/10/’2322/10/2023 00:25:39 | – |
| Mangerton (going) | n | Finally snapping and expressing one’s wordless anger - particularly if this is due to moving goalposts | Aoife | 12/02/’2412/02/2024 13:54:45 | 12/02/’2412/02/2024 16:08:31 |
| Marcus Aurelius | n | Dad’s pet name for Mark | Dad | 05/12/’2105/12/2021 18:18:08 | – |
| mardy | adj | Sulky, whiny | Clare | 07/01/’2407/01/2024 23:30:05 | – |
| Masterbakers | n | Generic term for TV shows that involve members of the public performing kitchen tasks | Mark | 30/11/’2430/11/2024 15:50:56 | – |
| may your wheels turn square and your petrol turn to water! | exc | A curse directed at disobliging drivers | Clare | 20/01/’2320/01/2023 00:55:40 | – |
| mece | exp | Mutually exclusive, collectively exhaustive | Mark | 05/05/’2405/05/2024 00:36:42 | 25/05/’2525/05/2025 10:23:28 |
| melon pee, come right here, come to the cookhouse door boys | verse | Just a thing that gets sung occasionally | M & N | 28/02/’2528/02/2025 00:42:07 | 28/02/’2528/02/2025 00:40:48 |
| mental floss | n | A brain teaser or exercise undertaken to develop mental acuity | Mark | 21/01/’2421/01/2024 01:12:16 | – |
| mental microwave | n | Mind | Riverbankers | 19/12/’2419/12/2024 12:56:31 | – |
| mexicakes | n | Mexican pancakes when made at home from tortillas, mince, vegetables etc. | Riverbankers | 11/08/’2111/08/2021 00:20:37 | 28/01/’2228/01/2022 01:22:04 |
| Milly-Molly-Mandy house | n | A stereotypical house, absolutely symmetrical with one window each side of the porch, three matching windows on the first floor (2ⁿᵈ if you’re American) & the pitch of the roof matching the pitch of the porch | Mum | 27/06/’2127/06/2021 16:07:43 | – |
| mimsy-mumblechumps | adj | Unenergetic, lethargic and unenthused… but only slightly | Mark | 06/11/’2406/11/2024 23:57:23 | 06/11/’2406/11/2024 23:58:38 |
| mingo | n | Flamingo | Joy | 13/05/’2213/05/2022 01:08:56 | – |
| minion | n | Urinal deodoriser block | Mark | 05/05/’2405/05/2024 00:32:39 | – |
| Ministry of Tidy Folk | n | [1] When composers in the classical tradition adopt folk music fatally by stabbing it through the soul with a baton.
[2] People who believe that the version of a folk tune they know is the one true and only version, in flagrant denial of the folk process | Mark | 05/12/’2105/12/2021 16:03:10 | 25/05/’2525/05/2025 10:20:41 |
| Ministry of Tidy Ruins | n | Generic term for English Heritage, Historic Scotland and similar organisations dedicated to setting the ragged remains of long-gone buildings in neatly trimmed grass | Naomi | 04/09/’2104/09/2021 12:45:49 | 05/12/’2105/12/2021 16:03:53 |
| misery bite | n | Comfort food when unwell | Felix | 18/04/’2218/04/2022 00:24:42 | – |
| misery chest | n | First aid kit taken on holidays, or medicine cupboard at home | Mum | 26/05/’2126/05/2021 14:23:55 | 27/05/’2127/05/2021 00:12:30 |
| mismanglement | n | Mismanagement, only more so | Mark | 14/03/’2114/03/2021 11:34:30 | – |
| misread between the lines | v | Detect subtext that the speaker/writer didn’t intend | Mark | 28/07/’2428/07/2024 15:16:18 | – |
| Miss Moppett | n | Aunt D’s pet name for her neice Kate Collard (later Baines, later Tomato) | Aunt D | 21/01/’2421/01/2024 01:04:00 | 21/01/’2421/01/2024 12:32:41 |
| Miss/Master Flum Bum | n | Handy moniker for anyone whose name you can’t, at that moment, remember | Aunt D | 06/03/’2206/03/2022 23:51:37 | – |
| mloddy | adj | Mouldy | Riverbankers | 11/02/’2211/02/2022 11:56:50 | – |
| mollydooker | n | A left-handed person, a southpaw | Win | 03/12/’2303/12/2023 00:56:20 | – |
| mondegreen | n | A misheard song lyric | Joy | 04/04/’2504/04/2025 23:46:14 | 16/06/’2516/06/2025 10:30:03 |
| more of a meal than a drink | exp | Tea served from a pot without a strainer | Paul H | 27/06/’2127/06/2021 16:16:28 | – |
| Moses | n | The most elastic man in the christian bible | Pa | 18/04/’2218/04/2022 00:16:47 | – |
| most highly flavoured gravy | verse | Mischievous variation on Most highly favoured lady, a line from the carol The Angel Gabriel | Mark | 11/02/’2211/02/2022 11:46:50 | 05/03/’2205/03/2022 22:06:23 |
| Mount Ararat | n | Mount Alvernia hospital, Guildford, which is a long climb from the bus stop on the Epsom road | Granny | 27/05/’2127/05/2021 21:15:27 | 30/10/’2330/10/2023 10:16:47 |
| Mount Toberead | n | The pile/stack/tower/mountain of books that a person wishes to read | Mark | 31/08/’2231/08/2022 00:11:32 | 18/12/’2218/12/2022 11:51:51 |
| move your lips! | exc | Your diction is unsatisfactory | Mum | 12/03/’2112/03/2021 14:47:14 | – |
| mozarella | adj | Tight over the belly, typically of a man’s white shirt | Mark | 30/06/’2230/06/2022 23:04:18 | – |
| Mr Brown upstairs smoking | n | The wholly fictitious person a young lad claimed would pay his bus fare, buying him time to scarper when the conductor went upstairs | Pop | 06/07/’2106/07/2021 15:13:30 | 19/08/’2319/08/2023 12:14:44 |
| Mr Bump | exp | An iterative navigation technique that eschews maps, plans and electronic devices and instead proceeds in the hope that each failed attempt will at least bring the traveller a little nearer to the destination. Characterised by scenic routes & late arrivals | Pa | 01/03/’2201/03/2022 16:30:30 | 01/03/’2201/03/2022 19:52:00 |
| Mrs McGillicuddy | n | A wheeled shopping bag | Mark | 13/12/’2413/12/2024 20:55:16 | 13/12/’2413/12/2024 21:50:16 |
| MSP | n | Moral superiority prize, earned by eating at a more moderate pace than fellow diners | M & N | 30/11/’2430/11/2024 16:30:27 | – |
| muchos cocineros chica/chico! | exc | My goodness, what a lot of people there are in the kitchen! | Carmen | 04/09/’2104/09/2021 12:50:58 | 27/06/’2527/06/2025 21:53:21 |
| Muggerborski | n | The composer Mussorgsky | Dad | 03/03/’2103/03/2021 21:29:03 | 03/03/’2103/03/2021 21:29:16 |
| Mulligan’s Tyres | n | Mull of Kintyre | Iliff family | 30/06/’2230/06/2022 23:08:57 | 17/12/’2417/12/2024 10:38:52 |
| murano | adj | Merino | M & N | 25/03/’2125/03/2021 17:06:11 | 28/06/’2528/06/2025 09:41:47 |
| my aunt, having made a telephone call, is feeling very much better | exp | Mischievous mistranslation of the French expression Tant pis, tant mieux | Mum | 27/01/’2227/01/2022 23:50:09 | 22/12/’2422/12/2024 11:47:55 |
| my back, my belly and my two sides | exp | Response to person complaining they feel unwell | JM | 12/05/’2112/05/2021 22:24:18 | – |
| my colleague of the sandpit | exp | A playmate whose name escaped young Benno | Benno | 11/02/’2411/02/2024 00:47:28 | – |
| my wife’s wedding anniversary | exp | Hallmark of an unromantic husband | Mark | 06/09/’2106/09/2021 01:06:59 | – |
| my word, Hetty | verse | A callback to the song fragment:
My word, Hetty
If I catch you on the jetty
I’ll saw your leg off
And stick it on with jam
In Amsterdam
…to a tune that the compilers have yet to identify | Granny | 25/05/’2125/05/2021 15:54:11 | 01/01/’2301/01/2023 13:30:05 |
| myzled | v | Misled | M & N | 19/08/’2119/08/2021 12:50:54 | – |
| Nacirema | n | The subject of a satirical article Pa once read in which an anthropologist reports upon the weird rituals of a tribe, before eventually revealing that they are none other than Americans | Pa | 17/09/’2317/09/2023 00:53:18 | – |
| named after famous letters of the alphabet | adj | Named unduly prosaically | Mark | 28/07/’2428/07/2024 14:51:31 | 20/06/’2520/06/2025 23:39:10 |
| nanny nagface | n | One prone to give far more criticism or other feedback than the situation warrants | Naomi | 11/02/’2211/02/2022 11:54:39 | 11/02/’2211/02/2022 12:54:07 |
| nice parking job, big guy! | exc | I am deeply unimpressed with your attempt at parking | M & N | 17/09/’2117/09/2021 21:52:09 | – |
| niggs | n | Eggs | Naomi | 30/03/’2130/03/2021 00:01:43 | 27/08/’2327/08/2023 12:20:31 |
| nim | n | Niece or nephew | Healiffs | 18/08/’2318/08/2023 22:03:57 | 18/08/’2318/08/2023 22:11:01 |
| nipple cake | n | Cherry bakewell | M & N | 19/03/’2119/03/2021 15:13:13 | – |
| no bones in it! | exp | Easy, little one, there’s nothing hard to swallow in my milk | Mum | 27/04/’2127/04/2021 13:47:44 | – |
| no fun allowed | exp | You have tried to do something nice for yourself and the world will not permit it | Healiff clan | 12/03/’2112/03/2021 15:04:44 | 12/03/’2112/03/2021 16:15:51 |
| no one knows me in Melbourne, so it doesn’t matter what I wear. Everyone knows me in Yarragon, so it doesn’t matter what I wear! | exp | There’s no need to dress smartly | Clare | 04/04/’2404/04/2024 00:22:17 | – |
| no use to man or dog | exp | No use to man or beast | Mark | 14/03/’2114/03/2021 15:53:08 | – |
| no, it was a new one | exp | Response to “was it an omen?” | Riverbankers | 10/07/’2210/07/2022 22:37:53 | 26/11/’2426/11/2024 20:33:27 |
| no, it’s just the way I’m breathing | exp | Time-honoured answer to the question “Are you coming?” | M & N | 16/03/’2116/03/2021 22:15:47 | – |
| noddles | n | Noodles | Riverbankers | 27/02/’2327/02/2023 12:59:26 | – |
| North Pole, duty penguin | exp | Mischievous or stroppy phrase for answering a ringing phone | Mark | 21/11/’2121/11/2021 14:09:47 | 19/12/’2119/12/2021 14:48:10 |
| north-south-west | n | New South Wales | M & N | 22/10/’2322/10/2023 00:49:33 | – |
| NORWICH | exp | kNickers Off Ready When I Come Home | M & N | 06/11/’2406/11/2024 23:39:43 | 11/11/’2411/11/2024 00:48:37 |
| nose pie | n | The yield from a nose-picking foray | Granny | 07/11/’2107/11/2021 23:33:08 | – |
| not much of anything, but well and truly elegant | exp | A more sophisticated and less substantial repast than usually appeared on the King family table | Granny Collard | 04/03/’2204/03/2022 00:35:00 | – |
| Notlob | n | Bolton, a town in Lancashire | M & N | 04/03/’2104/03/2021 12:44:08 | 18/10/’2418/10/2024 00:29:39 |
| now mighty Caesar turned to clay might stop a wall to keep the wind away | exp | We are all humbled in death | Mark | 29/01/’2229/01/2022 14:44:36 | – |
| now the weather turns quite dirty and the clock it strikes five-thirty | exp | The weather is taking a turn for the worse | M & N | 07/02/’2207/02/2022 23:04:47 | – |
| noxious weed | n | Non-native species of plant | Clare | 11/03/’2111/03/2021 21:03:14 | 30/03/’2230/03/2022 00:59:18 |
| noy | adv | 1. Now
2. No | Mark | 28/09/’2228/09/2022 15:01:16 | 28/09/’2228/09/2022 15:03:33 |
| NQOTD | exp | Not quite our type, darling | JM | 26/02/’2126/02/2021 19:48:17 | 02/03/’2102/03/2021 00:49:23 |
| nucking futter | n | One whose behaviour defies reason | Mark | 05/03/’2205/03/2022 15:58:23 | – |
| oatygoats | n | Goats | Clare | 07/04/’2107/04/2021 21:39:31 | 19/03/’2219/03/2022 22:33:59 |
| obsquecious | adj | Obsequious | King family | 17/09/’2117/09/2021 22:10:16 | – |
| obstacular | adj | In the nature or manner of an obstacle | Gareth | 12/03/’2112/03/2021 14:57:42 | 04/12/’2404/12/2024 10:52:21 |
| oddfather/oddmother | n | A role akin to godfather / godmother suitable for an atheist | Joy | 07/02/’2207/02/2022 23:08:43 | 16/12/’2416/12/2024 13:38:53 |
| Odgers | n | The TV presenter Mister Rogers, whose show was a favourite of Joy’s when she was about 2-3 | Joy | 31/08/’2231/08/2022 00:32:30 | – |
| of its time | adj | Offensive to current sensibilities | Joy | 19/12/’2419/12/2024 13:14:11 | – |
| oh bother! | exc | Things are not going well | Dad | 17/03/’2117/03/2021 13:15:53 | 26/01/’2226/01/2022 11:19:25 |
| oh dear… how sad… never mind | exp | I acknowledge your unhappiness, but consider it overstated | M & N | 14/01/’2214/01/2022 12:44:45 | 28/06/’2528/06/2025 09:33:25 |
| oh Lucky Jim! | exc | Well that’s not good | Naomi | 05/07/’2205/07/2022 01:18:15 | 10/07/’2210/07/2022 15:57:53 |
| Oh Nicholas, don’t be so ridiculous | verse | A short chant that Mum would come out with once in a while | Mum | 11/01/’2511/01/2025 23:47:44 | 11/01/’2511/01/2025 23:47:32 |
| oi’m a moinah | exp | I’m a mynah | M & N | 26/07/’2426/07/2024 16:31:18 | – |
| old bagaloon | n | Humourless older woman | Naomi | 06/03/’2106/03/2021 13:40:02 | – |
| old folk joke | n | A joke so old that it tickles no-one, but must be trotted out when a suitable setup is given | Pa | 11/08/’2111/08/2021 00:18:36 | 30/10/’2330/10/2023 11:01:33 |
| omzetbelasting | exc | Imprecation that sounds ruder than it is | Dad | 27/07/’2127/07/2021 21:17:29 | – |
| on pots hooray! | exc | 1. You have finally understood the thing I have been walking you to that I think is obvious.
2. We are looking at some ancient pottery including some form of decoration.
3. We are about to watch The Great Pottery Throwdown (more recent usage) | Joy | 12/02/’2412/02/2024 13:49:04 | 12/02/’2412/02/2024 16:06:56 |
| on the way to Meeting, I saw a butterfly and it reminded me of God | exp | Ministry at a Quaker Meeting at Sidcot School, executed for a bet | Clare | 01/03/’2201/03/2022 15:48:29 | 14/12/’2414/12/2024 01:41:52 |
| on the wonk | adj | Askew | Riverbanklings | 10/09/’2310/09/2023 14:51:22 | – |
| one goat! | exp | OK, I made a mistake. But I feel you’re attaching too much importance to it | Benno’s family | 21/01/’2421/01/2024 14:23:38 | – |
| One I love, Two I love, Three I love, I say | verse | Callback to:
One I love
Two I love
Three I love, I say.
Four I love with all my heart
Five I cast away.
Six he loves
Seven she loves
Eight they both love.
Nine he comes,
Ten he tarries,
Eleven they court,
Twelve they marry.
Thirteen they quarrel
Fourteen they part
Fifteen one dies of a broken heart | Granny Collard | 04/03/’2204/03/2022 00:28:11 | 05/03/’2205/03/2022 22:08:40 |
| one more shirt will do me | exp | Don’t wash or iron me any more shirts as I’m going to drop dead any moment now | Bel | 12/05/’2112/05/2021 22:28:35 | – |
| one up, one down, one polisher | exp | British Army heuristic for lavatory paper usage | Mark | 29/01/’2229/01/2022 14:37:28 | – |
| one-legged Santa at an arse kicking party | n | A now-retired Christmas decoration in Reading town centre | Riverbankers | 30/06/’2230/06/2022 23:37:47 | – |
| ontray! | exc | Special version of “come in” for room service when in France… because the food comes on a tray | G | 07/04/’2107/04/2021 22:15:43 | 10/04/’2110/04/2021 13:30:07 |
| oomagoolie | n | Umami, the one of the five basic tastes that didn’t have an English word (so we took the Japanese one) | Naomi | 21/11/’2121/11/2021 01:15:10 | 17/08/’2317/08/2023 23:43:18 |
| op | n | Any edible liquid/paste/stew | Healiff clan | 09/03/’2109/03/2021 16:37:49 | 11/03/’2111/03/2021 13:45:06 |
| open the breach and fire the gun | exp | Callback to the couplet:
Wakey wakey! Morning’s come
Open the breach and fire the gun | King family | 15/11/’2215/11/2022 20:15:09 | 15/11/’2215/11/2022 20:20:09 |
| operator | n | One practised at getting her/his/their own way | John T | 18/03/’2218/03/2022 00:32:35 | 18/03/’2218/03/2022 00:33:10 |
| oponopof | adj | A city sightseeing tour bus, as found in many tourist destinations, that allows passengers to hop on and off throughout the day | M & N | 26/07/’2426/07/2024 20:54:20 | – |
| optical illusion, man! | exp | It is an optical illusion | Clare | 27/02/’2327/02/2023 12:16:08 | – |
| optometrist method | n | A/B testing, in which users of a system, product or idea under development are asked “is it better like this… or like this?” | Mark | 24/04/’2324/04/2023 14:34:59 | 24/04/’2324/04/2023 14:36:30 |
| ordinary Australian tea | n | India tea | Pa | 27/02/’2327/02/2023 12:00:06 | – |
| organ donor | n | Cyclist | Mark | 08/10/’2208/10/2022 01:02:56 | – |
| orpathedic | adj | Orthopaedic | JM | 29/07/’2129/07/2021 12:07:05 | 19/12/’2119/12/2021 14:42:33 |
| osh | n | Generic term for sauces, soufflés, jellies, dips, pastes, pickles and other comestibles of a similar consistency | King family | 04/03/’2104/03/2021 12:59:41 | 09/03/’2109/03/2021 16:38:44 |
| oslo | n | An instrumental solo during a song | Riverbankers | 21/01/’2421/01/2024 14:55:26 | – |
| our friend who travels on his belly | n | Snake | Pa | 04/03/’2204/03/2022 15:59:38 | – |
| ours | adj | Our | Joy | 13/05/’2213/05/2022 01:10:32 | – |
| ouzo | n | Ozone | Riverbankers | 07/11/’2107/11/2021 23:26:44 | 19/12/’2119/12/2021 14:25:46 |
| overdog | n | Supplier that enjoys market dominance, such as Amazon or Google | Mark | 30/11/’2430/11/2024 16:06:02 | – |
| Oyé | n | Evelyn’s name for herself when she was known as Joyce (which was up to her late teens) | Evelyn | 09/03/’2209/03/2022 15:39:41 | – |
| P silent, as in bathing | exp | A jokey way of pointing out that P can be silent in English words, such as psychology, receipt, pterodactyl & raspberry | Granny | 11/01/’2511/01/2025 23:48:17 | – |
| p-o-tat-oes | verse | Callback to a song:
p-o-tat-oes O OOOO O OO | Dad | 19/03/’2219/03/2022 14:28:28 | 20/06/’2320/06/2023 16:26:22 |
| PAC | n | 1) Pissing awful coffee.
2) Pa’s awful coffee
…depending on the audience | King family | 13/04/’2113/04/2021 13:18:36 | – |
| Page Nine | n | The Italian violinist & composer Niccolò Paganini | King family | 14/01/’2214/01/2022 12:32:32 | 19/08/’2319/08/2023 12:05:27 |
| palanquin hee, palanquin ho | exp | Bonding cry – no meaning | M & N | 12/11/’2312/11/2023 00:54:03 | 12/11/’2312/11/2023 00:54:20 |
| palayorno | n | Palamino | Mark | 26/07/’2426/07/2024 16:34:41 | 03/03/’2503/03/2025 10:26:01 |
| pang! | exc | Like bang, but clangier | Clare | 03/03/’2103/03/2021 14:59:19 | 04/03/’2104/03/2021 00:05:31 |
| panty | n | Pantograph (in the context of current collection) | Naomi | 30/06/’2230/06/2022 23:32:02 | – |
| par cark | n | Car park | Iliff family | 18/04/’2218/04/2022 00:31:06 | – |
| park by ear | v | Park a vehicle with a lack of care, attention and skill | M & N | 30/06/’2230/06/2022 23:27:47 | – |
| park-anywheres | n | A vehicle’s hazard warning lights (aka four-way flashers) | Aoife | 04/03/’2104/03/2021 12:25:14 | 10/12/’2410/12/2024 21:08:56 |
| parroty error | exp | When your parrot says “pieces of seven” | M & N | 01/03/’2201/03/2022 15:04:13 | 22/01/’2422/01/2024 12:10:09 |
| pas de freinage violent inutile | exp | Drive carefully | M & N | 08/10/’2208/10/2022 01:09:25 | – |
| pasteurised is best | exp | Reflexive response to use of the word pasteurised | M & N | 07/01/’2407/01/2024 00:45:25 | 07/01/’2407/01/2024 10:46:29 |
| paucey | adj | Limp, pale or unprepossessing | Granny | 21/03/’2121/03/2021 22:29:05 | – |
| Pawdawfawdy | n | The main bus terminal in New York | Mark | 11/02/’2411/02/2024 00:58:58 | – |
| PEBUCK | exp | The user – generally of a computer – is being a bit thick | Mark | 12/11/’2312/11/2023 00:31:04 | – |
| pee shilling toosh | n | Two shilling piece | Dad | 28/01/’2528/01/2025 01:25:14 | 28/01/’2528/01/2025 01:25:10 |
| peelywally | adj | Unwell, washed out, under the weather, pale & uninteresting | Granny | 09/03/’2109/03/2021 21:13:33 | 12/11/’2412/11/2024 12:22:13 |
| peelywally baggie | n | Part-baked baguette | Mark | 09/03/’2109/03/2021 21:15:49 | 16/02/’2216/02/2022 16:20:17 |
| peepy-eyed | adj | Frowzy, especially if eyes swollen from lack of (or too much) sleep | Clayhoffs (aka Westerdons) | 27/02/’2227/02/2022 14:53:56 | 21/01/’2421/01/2024 11:41:52 |
| percussive maintenance | n | Trying to fix a thing by hitting it | Riverbankers | 01/07/’2201/07/2022 21:12:25 | – |
| perkins | n | Perquisites | King family | 31/03/’2531/03/2025 00:28:49 | – |
| perry meter | n | Perimeter | Mark | 30/11/’2430/11/2024 16:16:09 | 01/12/’2401/12/2024 12:22:52 |
| perslongings | n | Possessions | Mark | 10/03/’2210/03/2022 18:08:40 | 10/03/’2210/03/2022 18:30:36 |
| PhD point | n | A subtlety in a creative work so obscure that it will pass unnoticed, unless it becomes the subject of a PhD one day | Mark | 13/03/’2113/03/2021 22:23:03 | 21/03/’2121/03/2021 22:53:49 |
| pick a note or go home | exc | I am pained by your excessive use of vibrato and/or coloratura | Mark | 07/02/’2207/02/2022 22:59:39 | – |
| pick up fag-ends | v | Pay attention to snippets of others’ conversation, perhaps without the full context, often with a view to joining in. Or butting in, if you will | Mark | 07/11/’2107/11/2021 23:19:55 | 26/11/’2426/11/2024 16:19:46 |
| pictureskew | adj | Picturesque | Iliff family | 10/03/’2210/03/2022 18:26:48 | – |
| piece of chelief | n | Chief of police | Mark | 28/02/’2228/02/2022 15:41:51 | – |
| pif-pof-paf | n | A ruleless, winnerless game that can be seen on beaches throughout Europe. It involves 3 or more people hitting a ball between them with wooden bats | M & N | 31/08/’2231/08/2022 00:06:07 | – |
| Piglet | n | Affectionate name for Eve, the youngest member of the Claydon family | Clare | 11/02/’2411/02/2024 00:38:56 | 11/02/’2411/02/2024 00:41:59 |
| pimps | adj | Easy | Riverbanklings | 27/02/’2327/02/2023 13:07:14 | – |
| pince mie | n | Mince pie, the Christmas comestible | Riverbankers | 18/03/’2218/03/2022 00:44:54 | – |
| Pinchmi-Wel | verse | A little-known acquaintance of Adam and Eve | Mum | 11/08/’2411/08/2024 01:04:13 | 12/01/’2512/01/2025 12:10:13 |
| pingams | n | Belly button | King family | 03/03/’2103/03/2021 23:53:57 | – |
| pinghole | n | Microwave oven | Mark | 08/03/’2108/03/2021 16:08:49 | 08/03/’2108/03/2021 16:09:21 |
| pither | v | Waste time. Engage in displacement activities. Avoid a task | Mum | 28/02/’2328/02/2023 22:32:00 | 17/12/’2417/12/2024 12:13:01 |
| pitiless bottom | n | One much given to letting pungent farts | Naomi | 02/04/’2402/04/2024 18:10:39 | 10/11/’2410/11/2024 12:11:32 |
| pixies | n | Pixels | Al | 26/07/’2426/07/2024 21:07:08 | 29/07/’2429/07/2024 11:51:59 |
| PLAN AHE | exp | Plan ahead | Mark | 26/08/’2326/08/2023 21:29:07 | – |
| playback | n | The luggage area of an estate car | Mum | 08/03/’2108/03/2021 16:11:41 | 28/01/’2228/01/2022 16:55:22 |
| plug | v | Conceal item in the rectum | Naomi | 05/02/’2205/02/2022 21:34:59 | – |
| plup in a cup | v | Provide a semen sample | Naomi | 07/01/’2407/01/2024 00:39:24 | 07/01/’2407/01/2024 00:40:09 |
| POETS day | n | Piss off early, tomorrow’s Saturday (or, for sensitive ears, Push off…) | Mark | 27/05/’2127/05/2021 00:16:34 | – |
| poffle | n | Pop filter for a microphone | Mark | 24/03/’2124/03/2021 15:40:49 | – |
| pointèd stick | n | Pointed stick | M & N | 12/03/’2112/03/2021 18:16:01 | 09/11/’2409/11/2024 15:15:04 |
| politician’s syllogism | n | A faulty decision-making process that follows this sequence:
Something must be done ➠ This is something ➠ We must therefore do this | Mark | 26/07/’2426/07/2024 21:11:42 | – |
| pome | n | Poem | Dad | 11/01/’2511/01/2025 23:44:19 | 11/01/’2511/01/2025 23:44:14 |
| Pomp & Circumstance | n | The erstwhile Surrey painters, decorators and handymen Sigmund & Pomp | Mum | 27/06/’2527/06/2025 22:37:45 | – |
| poo tickets | n | Toilet roll, lavatory paper, bogroll, torchecul, bum fodder… call it what you will | Clayhoffs (aka Westerdons) | 28/02/’2228/02/2022 16:06:15 | – |
| Pope scuttle | n | Passetto di Borgo, the 800 metre concealed passageway that connects the Vatican to Castel Sant’Angelo for purposes of running away | Mark | 30/07/’2330/07/2023 23:21:01 | 31/07/’2331/07/2023 00:03:17 |
| Poppa Piccolino | n | Granny’s pet name for Pop | Granny | 23/11/’2323/11/2023 18:56:15 | 17/03/’2517/03/2025 10:20:32 |
| popular beat combo | n | A group or band that has enjoyed some success in the singles charts | M & N | 29/10/’2329/10/2023 00:30:14 | – |
| pornograph | n | Imaginary appliance for displaying pornography | Pa | 05/03/’2105/03/2021 13:44:00 | – |
| potato sock | n | Sock with several holes | Naomi | 04/03/’2104/03/2021 13:18:57 | – |
| poverty model | n | Bottom-of-the-range option, especally where the cost savings are conspicuous | Uncle Tommy | 03/03/’2103/03/2021 15:03:58 | – |
| practise beforehand which ruins the fun | verse | Take preparation seriously. Callback to Flanders & Swann’s A song of patriotic prejudice:
And all the world over each nation’s the same
They’ve simply no notion of playing the game
They argue with umpires, they cheer when they’ve won
And they practise beforehand which ruins the fun | M & N | 27/06/’2127/06/2021 16:21:23 | 05/03/’2205/03/2022 22:09:58 |
| prat flaps | n | A particular type of men’s open leather sandal, especially if large, droopy and worn with socks | Riverbankers | 18/04/’2218/04/2022 00:35:37 | – |
| premium bomb | n | Premium Bond, a savings product of UK’s NS&I | Naomi | 15/11/’2215/11/2022 20:26:36 | – |
| prickly pig | n | Echidna, the spine-covered egg-laying mammal sometimes misleadingly known as spiny anteater | Win | 05/03/’2205/03/2022 22:26:51 | 06/03/’2206/03/2022 11:11:42 |
| priest car | n | Morris Minor, a 1948-71 economy car that could have given the VW Beetle a run for its money on the world stage had it been as reliable | Mark | 05/12/’2105/12/2021 15:40:20 | 04/04/’2504/04/2025 23:33:01 |
| priestidge | n | Prestige | Granny | 24/03/’2124/03/2021 15:42:42 | 10/11/’2410/11/2024 12:05:34 |
| priffs | n | Peripheral vision | Mark | 04/05/’2404/05/2024 23:49:58 | – |
| proceed directly to the scene of the accident | v | Lose control when driving | Riverbankers | 19/12/’2419/12/2024 12:59:52 | 19/12/’2419/12/2024 13:18:12 |
| pron | exp | Can be used both for “Please would you turn on the printer” and for “I have now turned on the printer, my love” | M & N | 22/10/’2322/10/2023 00:53:40 | – |
| propelleper | n | Propeller | Felix | 08/01/’2208/01/2022 00:40:47 | 10/01/’2210/01/2022 11:31:51 |
| prunt | v | Printed | M & N | 21/08/’2321/08/2023 08:59:14 | – |
| puffin break | n | When climbing, a puffing break with a pretext | Naomi | 04/03/’2104/03/2021 13:03:59 | – |
| pugsaw jizzle | n | Jigsaw puzzle | Mark | 13/03/’2113/03/2021 22:44:30 | – |
| pump | n | Nonsense | Mark | 24/03/’2124/03/2021 15:44:51 | 24/12/’2124/12/2021 14:37:56 |
| pumpkin time | n | Bed time | Naomi | 21/11/’2121/11/2021 01:09:27 | 18/03/’2218/03/2022 00:50:33 |
| punctuality is a politeness of kings | exp | Don’t be late | Mark | 11/08/’2111/08/2021 00:08:03 | – |
| pune or play on words | n | Pun or wordplay | Riverbankers | 21/03/’2121/03/2021 22:33:03 | – |
| purple-headeds | n | Mountains | G | 02/03/’2102/03/2021 00:24:06 | 04/03/’2104/03/2021 00:06:25 |
| pushen | n | Cushion | Iliff family | 29/12/’2229/12/2022 15:27:46 | 30/12/’2230/12/2022 11:07:59 |
| put fur/hair round it! | exc | You seem to be having problem getting this thing in the appropriate hole - perhaps if it was more akin to a more biological insertion you would have more success. | Riverbanklings | 12/02/’2412/02/2024 13:42:54 | 12/02/’2412/02/2024 15:06:08 |
| put it away – nothing wrong with it | exp | You are not unwell | King family | 01/07/’2201/07/2022 13:26:46 | – |
| put the lumps in the gravy | v | Make the gravy | Naomi | 25/01/’2425/01/2024 00:01:00 | – |
| Pyongyang Tower | n | The residential tower block Thames Quarter in Reading | Mark | 11/01/’2511/01/2025 23:43:52 | 11/01/’2511/01/2025 23:43:22 |
| p’daahlo | n | Pedalo | Mum | 24/03/’2124/03/2021 15:39:14 | – |
| QB | n | That feeling of numbness that can result from sitting still for an hour | Clare | 28/09/’2228/09/2022 00:05:03 | 28/09/’2228/09/2022 14:57:58 |
| queece | n | Breast meat (aka white meat) of a roast fowl | Dad | 16/11/’2216/11/2022 16:59:21 | 16/11/’2216/11/2022 21:31:30 |
| Quick J | n | QICJ, the informal network Quakers in Criminal Justice | Mark | 31/03/’2531/03/2025 00:27:51 | 01/04/’2501/04/2025 09:58:41 |
| R Sole | n | A favoured alias for an oarsman standing in as a cox | M & N | 13/12/’2413/12/2024 21:25:55 | – |
| rabbit of negative euphoria | n | One who is unhappy | Riverbankers | 17/03/’2117/03/2021 13:18:48 | 21/03/’2221/03/2022 00:06:49 |
| railway cake | n | Fruitcake sold by the slice, typically on trains and at stations | Mark | 31/03/’2531/03/2025 00:28:42 | – |
| rattle your dags! | exc | Get a move on! | Felix | 12/07/’2212/07/2022 01:02:32 | 26/11/’2426/11/2024 16:21:02 |
| ready-ready | adj | Ready, this moment, to do the next thing (as opposed to starting to think about bringing the previous activity to a close… at some point… probably, which is some people’s idea of “ready”) | G | 09/08/’2109/08/2021 15:38:36 | 09/08/’2109/08/2021 15:43:02 |
| rebug | v | While attempting to fix software bugs, make matters worse instead of better | Mark | 30/11/’2430/11/2024 16:17:43 | – |
| rectal floss | n | The type of swimming attire that disappears up the wearer’s bum crack (intentionally) | Mark | 23/04/’2123/04/2021 23:11:31 | – |
| redbrick | n | A consequence of eating beetroot | Naomi | 30/07/’2330/07/2023 23:57:18 | 08/11/’2408/11/2024 12:59:14 |
| renana | n | Banana | Mark | 15/11/’2215/11/2022 20:21:57 | – |
| rent to the ideal | exp | The cost of trust. The price paid for the comfort of trusting people | Naomi | 04/02/’2204/02/2022 15:17:11 | 24/01/’2424/01/2024 15:41:34 |
| respectawiggle | adj | Respectable | Naomi | 17/03/’2117/03/2021 13:03:28 | – |
| richtigetonneohnenachbarnprüfenstolz | n | The pride felt at putting out the right bin without first checking what the neighbours have done | Mark | 14/04/’2214/04/2022 01:38:48 | 14/04/’2214/04/2022 10:36:01 |
| Rickety Rackety Bridge | n | The Bailey bridge that used to carry the A246 Leatherhead by-pass across the River Mole | Iliff family | 06/11/’2406/11/2024 23:31:27 | 15/12/’2415/12/2024 23:35:14 |
| Riding to Llandudno on a charabanc… | verse | Callback to:
Riding to Llandudno on a charabanc
Fifty miles an hour and we don’t care a hang
The engine’s full of petrol and the driver’s full of beer.
(If there was a next line we never heard it) | Granny | 29/12/’2229/12/2022 15:20:07 | – |
| rigoletto | exp | Spurious appointment Mark would put in his work diary when wishing to swerve the threat of an evening work commitment | Mark | 22/10/’2422/10/2024 21:18:26 | – |
| roastby spuds | n | Roast potatoes | Iliff family | 08/01/’2208/01/2022 00:32:29 | 08/01/’2208/01/2022 01:25:42 |
| Rockin’ Goose | n | Angus Rock, also known as Rock Angus, a skerry that stands in the middle of the entrance to Strangford Lough | John T | 30/09/’2430/09/2024 11:22:59 | – |
| Rod & Staff | n | The erstwhile Surrey electrician Rod Green and his sidekick | Mum | 27/06/’2527/06/2025 22:37:46 | – |
| rough as a badger | adj | Rough (in the sense of not smooth, but not in the sense of approximate) | Mark | 17/09/’2117/09/2021 21:47:02 | – |
| RTFM | exp | Read the manual (instead of bothering me) | M & N | 02/03/’2202/03/2022 23:06:24 | – |
| rumble-tumble | n | Anglo-Indian dish comprising scrambled eggs, onions and whatever stuff needs eating up | Pa | 05/03/’2205/03/2022 22:24:04 | 05/03/’2205/03/2022 22:54:14 |
| run around to get wet | adj | Having a low rate of flow (of a bathroom shower) | Mum | 01/07/’2201/07/2022 21:09:35 | – |
| SA0 | n | One lacking in situational awareness | Mark | 28/02/’2328/02/2023 22:35:01 | 18/01/’2518/01/2025 00:56:47 |
| sadlydie | v | Die | Mark | 21/01/’2421/01/2024 01:25:53 | – |
| saganaki! | exc | Goodness me, what low-hanging testicles that chap has been blessed with! | M & N | 04/03/’2104/03/2021 13:15:27 | 25/02/’2225/02/2022 16:40:09 |
| said Aunt Helga | exp | response to anyone saying “tis” (or “it is” without sufficient care) | Gareth | 12/03/’2112/03/2021 15:28:56 | 12/03/’2112/03/2021 16:14:54 |
| Saint Sean | n | The French composer Camille Saint-Saëns | Mark | 14/01/’2214/01/2022 12:30:16 | 21/10/’2421/10/2024 15:14:48 |
| salad pie | n | Quiche | Mark | 13/04/’2113/04/2021 13:06:02 | – |
| samting, nating | exp | Not worth worrying about (or remembering or noticing) | Clare | 28/02/’2228/02/2022 16:20:37 | 28/02/’2228/02/2022 16:21:10 |
| Sanata | n | Sinatra | Mark | 30/11/’2430/11/2024 15:54:30 | – |
| Santa Masakeena | n | San Tomas Aquino | M & N | 27/06/’2527/06/2025 22:37:49 | – |
| sarandoppity | n | Serendipity | JM | 02/04/’2402/04/2024 16:18:14 | – |
| sat in a tyre | exp | Reference to the phrase Dressed in silk and satin attire | King family | 19/01/’2219/01/2022 23:45:11 | 24/05/’2524/05/2025 23:41:30 |
| sausinge | n | Sausage | Naomi | 13/03/’2113/03/2021 16:28:41 | – |
| scraper | n | Violin | Riverbankers | 07/01/’2407/01/2024 00:06:48 | – |
| seagull | n | One whose style of management or participation is irregular and unhelpful | Mark | 12/11/’2312/11/2023 00:27:20 | – |
| sealion | adj | Senile | King family | 06/09/’2106/09/2021 00:53:30 | – |
| second coffee | n | Weak brew made by re-steeping grounds that have already been used to make the nice coffee | Clare | 28/01/’2228/01/2022 01:11:13 | 29/01/’2229/01/2022 00:28:16 |
| senseless man | n | Census man | Naomi | 05/03/’2105/03/2021 13:39:32 | 05/03/’2105/03/2021 14:40:03 |
| shabby and miscellaneous | adj | Disappointing | Riverbankers | 02/03/’2102/03/2021 13:21:45 | 10/11/’2410/11/2024 12:11:00 |
| sham-PAG-nee | n | Champagne | Clayhoffs (aka Westerdons) | 20/01/’2320/01/2023 00:49:20 | – |
| shenzi | adj | Below standard, no good | Clare | 02/03/’2202/03/2022 23:15:50 | – |
| sherman | n | Act of self-pleasure | Mark | 27/02/’2327/02/2023 12:56:30 | 04/09/’2404/09/2024 12:19:52 |
| shining wit | exp | Whining shit. One given to uttering a succession of exaggerated complaints in response to meagre provocation | M & N | 19/12/’2419/12/2024 13:02:06 | 03/01/’2503/01/2025 14:41:22 |
| shit in one sock | adj | Organised | Naomi | 04/04/’2504/04/2025 23:49:17 | 04/04/’2504/04/2025 23:49:04 |
| shith-ooze | n | Seat of ease, convenience, lavatory | M & N | 13/05/’2213/05/2022 01:14:20 | 17/01/’2317/01/2023 11:26:40 |
| shitzu | n | A zoo without penguins | Felix | 12/11/’2312/11/2023 00:28:21 | – |
| shivery bite | n | Biscuit or sweet issued after a swim | Mum | 03/03/’2103/03/2021 13:50:18 | 28/03/’2128/03/2021 13:05:29 |
| short arms, deep pockets | adj | Mean, stingy | Mark | 08/03/’2108/03/2021 16:04:48 | 22/12/’2422/12/2024 01:02:04 |
| shot a bunny | v | Passed wind | JM | 29/03/’2129/03/2021 23:58:54 | – |
| showing all you possess | adj | Wearing immodest clothing | Mum | 23/11/’2323/11/2023 23:17:26 | – |
| shrapnel | n | Small change, especially foreign coins that would be worthless on returning home | Joy | 28/02/’2228/02/2022 15:35:13 | – |
| shrimp-wrapped | adj | Shrink-wrapped | Mark | 25/05/’2125/05/2021 15:40:39 | – |
| shusho | exp | Expression used when walking with tiny steps, as when traversing ice or other slippery surface | Naomi | 11/02/’2411/02/2024 01:19:59 | 29/09/’2429/09/2024 15:20:46 |
| shut up and give your arse a chance | exp | You appear to be talking nonsense | M & N | 17/03/’2117/03/2021 21:07:15 | 12/01/’2512/01/2025 12:57:49 |
| sickly cake | n | Individual cake of the indulgent type served for afternoon tea at the right sort of hotel | Granny | 11/03/’2111/03/2021 16:21:43 | 21/12/’2121/12/2021 11:45:23 |
| Silliam William | n | Intentionally pompous variation of the mild put-down Silly Billy | Mark | 06/07/’2106/07/2021 15:09:20 | 22/01/’2422/01/2024 01:08:20 |
| Sister/Brother | exp | Useful device for addressing someone when you’ve forgotten their name | Pa | 08/03/’2208/03/2022 20:37:07 | 16/12/’2416/12/2024 13:39:12 |
| sixpence! | exp | Exclaimed at top volume by the first person at a meal to find a bone in their fish | King family | 07/01/’2407/01/2024 23:36:17 | 08/01/’2408/01/2024 01:39:59 |
| SLAB DISH PIG GUFF | exp | Mnemonic for recalling the then-15 members of the EU | Mark | 30/06/’2230/06/2022 23:22:39 | 04/09/’2404/09/2024 12:21:40 |
| slap it in the middle and we’ll all get a bit | exp | I propose (or threaten) to serve this jelly, rice pudding, trifle or other osh by striking it in the middle with a ladle | Granny | 19/03/’2119/03/2021 15:30:12 | 04/12/’2304/12/2023 12:08:37 |
| slave driver | n | Fitness tracker | Naomi | 02/01/’2502/01/2025 00:14:49 | – |
| slimy ming fruit | n | Avocado | Felix | 28/02/’2128/02/2021 14:38:25 | 08/03/’2108/03/2021 19:05:44 |
| sloppies | n | Loose-fitting clothing worn inside the home. Daylight PJs | Riverbankers | 10/02/’2210/02/2022 15:13:11 | – |
| smells like coffee, looks like cocoa | n | WW1 army tea | Pop | 14/03/’2114/03/2021 13:42:07 | 14/03/’2114/03/2021 13:46:13 |
| smoke | v | Work out, deduce, grasp the meaning of a conundrum, puzzle or joke | M & N | 21/11/’2421/11/2024 15:59:19 | 21/11/’2421/11/2024 16:20:33 |
| smoko | n | Morning tea, especially when taken in a shearing shed | Clayhoffs (aka Westerdons) | 15/11/’2215/11/2022 19:47:06 | – |
| smoky hole | n | Small keyhole | M & N | 31/03/’2531/03/2025 00:28:21 | – |
| Smoky Tree, the | n | The vast ancient yew tree & friend in the middle of the meadow at Sheepleas that Iliffs would climb and sit in, or use as a pavilion, when youngsters | Bel | 10/03/’2310/03/2023 01:09:23 | 15/03/’2315/03/2023 12:35:02 |
| Snablats | n | St Albans | Mark | 04/03/’2104/03/2021 12:49:31 | 03/01/’2203/01/2022 15:26:40 |
| sniggle | v | Like snigger, but with less implied criticism | Al | 05/07/’2105/07/2021 12:44:47 | 05/07/’2105/07/2021 15:34:26 |
| snorker | n | Sausage | Mark | 23/11/’2123/11/2021 23:00:17 | – |
| snortelly snips | n | Sleep, especially in anticipation | Naomi | 17/03/’2117/03/2021 21:13:01 | 19/03/’2119/03/2021 11:12:58 |
| snot harpoon | n | Nasal swab | Mark | 07/11/’2107/11/2021 23:35:47 | – |
| snotty gobbles (or snot block) | n | Vanilla slices | Clayhoffs (aka Westerdons) | 04/03/’2204/03/2022 15:43:15 | – |
| so you do that | exp | Response to an inaudible PA announcement | Iliff family | 08/03/’2108/03/2021 14:34:13 | 10/11/’2410/11/2024 12:28:50 |
| sof | adj | Like soft, but softer | Joy | 02/03/’2102/03/2021 00:35:02 | – |
| soft day | n | A day that’s raining stair-rods (cats & dogs, the devil & pitchforks, bullfrogs or your own regional expression to taste) | Mum | 15/11/’2215/11/2022 20:40:39 | – |
| soft poop | n | Soft scoop ice cream, noted more for its malleability than its delectability | Riverbankers | 10/07/’2210/07/2022 16:05:36 | – |
| some people really work at being miserable | exp | Gosh, s/he doesn’t look for the silver lining! | M & N | 06/07/’2106/07/2021 14:53:38 | 06/07/’2106/07/2021 14:54:57 |
| sooky | adj | Timid and/or apt to complain and/or resistant to fun | Clare | 17/03/’2117/03/2021 13:23:46 | – |
| sorry-pardon | exc | I trust you will forgive my trivial error | Iliff family | 03/07/’2203/07/2022 12:26:57 | – |
| sound as a pound | adj | Highly reliable. Also: In very good health | Riverbankers | 05/02/’2205/02/2022 15:59:33 | – |
| soya sturvya | exp | I am sorry to disturb you | Riverbankers | 03/04/’2103/04/2021 13:16:28 | – |
| spacemen drop-off | n | Specimen drop-off | Felix | 27/03/’2127/03/2021 15:22:00 | 09/07/’2109/07/2021 11:31:47 |
| spanish Tourette’s | n | The practice of unexpectedly swatting between the hands insects in flight that are too small for observers to see | Joy | 07/11/’2207/11/2022 00:31:52 | 12/02/’2412/02/2024 13:35:44 |
| sparkling plugs | n | Spark plugs | Iliff family | 27/04/’2127/04/2021 13:43:00 | – |
| sparrow piss | n | A rain shower so nugatory that it doesn’t even wet the grass | Win | 18/03/’2218/03/2022 00:56:12 | – |
| sparrowfart | n | Very early in the morning | Granny | 21/11/’2121/11/2021 01:30:38 | 18/03/’2218/03/2022 00:56:45 |
| spearmint wino | n | Problem drinker who erroneously believes that sucking a mint will hide the alcohol on their breath | Mark | 27/02/’2327/02/2023 12:45:46 | 27/02/’2327/02/2023 12:46:32 |
| spider | n | The green bit of stalk on a tomato | Aunt D | 08/10/’2208/10/2022 01:23:59 | – |
| spider werb | n | Spider’s web | Joy | 27/06/’2127/06/2021 15:49:31 | – |
| Spindleshanks | n | Dad’s pet name for Jane-Marie, and later for Bel | Dad | 28/01/’2228/01/2022 01:02:01 | 09/10/’2209/10/2022 00:07:02 |
| splash and dash | n | Quick foray to the grocery shop | Riverbankers | 01/01/’2201/01/2022 14:52:24 | – |
| splash me boots! | exp | Excuse me while I make a visit to the gents’ lavatory | Mark | 12/03/’2112/03/2021 21:17:27 | 13/03/’2113/03/2021 22:39:03 |
| spoons | n | The time and headspace required for a proposed undertaking | Joy | 11/02/’2411/02/2024 01:26:14 | 11/02/’2411/02/2024 11:08:04 |
| spose | n | Common-law spouse | Mark | 28/02/’2228/02/2022 15:32:29 | 11/01/’2511/01/2025 13:48:35 |
| squabble & beak | n | Edited¹: The Westerhoff version of bubble & squeak, comprising shallow-fried leftover potatoes and cabbage | Clare | 07/01/’2407/01/2024 23:32:25 | 21/01/’2421/01/2024 15:02:45 |
| square eyes | n | One who watches a lot of TV | Iliff family | 02/02/’2202/02/2022 00:42:48 | – |
| square measles | n | A QR code, one of those 2-D barcode things like… like… well, like square measles | Mark | 28/09/’2228/09/2022 14:53:33 | – |
| squashed fly biscuits | n | Garibaldi biscuits, the ones with currants squashed between two thin rectangles of biscuit | King family | 06/03/’2206/03/2022 23:49:05 | – |
| squeamful | adj | Like squeamish, but less indefinite | Mark | 17/03/’2117/03/2021 13:08:30 | – |
| squelchy | adj | Intimate, sexual | Mark | 06/11/’2406/11/2024 23:20:45 | 22/11/’2422/11/2024 13:43:20 |
| squozen | v | Squeezed | M & N | 28/01/’2528/01/2025 01:26:50 | – |
| St Reatham | n | Gentrified pronunciation of the London district Streatham | Brian | 25/05/’2125/05/2021 15:25:30 | – |
| stabbing | n | Blood test. Can also refer to an injection | Mark | 23/03/’2123/03/2021 23:03:32 | 21/11/’2121/11/2021 11:55:21 |
| Stephen Physics | n | 1. Personification of physics
2. Any physical law that provides an obstacle in life | Gareth | 12/02/’2412/02/2024 14:17:56 | 12/02/’2412/02/2024 16:11:19 |
| Steve | n | The UK restaurant chain Bella Italia (formerly Bella Pasta) | Felix | 11/02/’2411/02/2024 01:21:58 | – |
| stiffie | n | A 3½ inch diskette, an obsolete removable storage medium for computers capable of storing 1·44 MB of data – months’ office work in the 1980s, or about a quarter of a typical digital photo in 2023 | Mark | 30/07/’2330/07/2023 23:33:44 | 17/12/’2417/12/2024 12:10:37 |
| Stinkyniger | n | Rhosneigr, the seaside village in Anglesey | Dixon family | 12/05/’2112/05/2021 22:13:50 | 12/05/’2112/05/2021 22:20:05 |
| Stirling Moss, chica/chico! | exc | Goodness me, you seem to be driving exuberantly today | Carmen | 02/03/’2102/03/2021 12:56:35 | 02/03/’2102/03/2021 16:20:15 |
| straight-straight-straight | exp | Straight on | M & N | 11/08/’2111/08/2021 00:23:45 | – |
| stuck in me clack | exp | Stuck in my throat | Granny | 01/03/’2201/03/2022 15:21:59 | – |
| stumps (or call stumps) | exp | Declare the end of play – call a halt to an undertaking with no defined end, or simply decide it’s bedtime | M & N | 13/03/’2113/03/2021 16:35:59 | – |
| stunned mullet | n | One ill-suited to an employment, and apparently unaware of it | Riverbankers | 17/09/’2317/09/2023 00:44:53 | 08/12/’2408/12/2024 13:32:05 |
| subtropical swimming paradise | n | Swimming pool with doodads | Paul H | 11/09/’2311/09/2023 15:19:01 | – |
| suicide bikers | n | Cyclists who ride in a “wanton or furious” manner (see Notes) | Mark | 28/02/’2528/02/2025 00:42:05 | – |
| sun, sea, sand and, er…, palms | exp | Manual self-stimulation | Riverbankers | 28/07/’2128/07/2021 18:43:39 | – |
| surface filing | n | A system of filing that involves leaving everything on the desktop, ie no system at all | Mark | 28/02/’2228/02/2022 15:46:09 | 01/03/’2201/03/2022 12:27:03 |
| Suss-ar-ekal! | exc | Pa’s take on his father’s take on a Sikh battle cry | Pa | 09/03/’2209/03/2022 22:12:35 | – |
| susu | n | Breast; breast milk. | Clare | 01/03/’2201/03/2022 20:02:57 | 01/03/’2201/03/2022 20:04:51 |
| susu bilong bulmacow | n | Cows’ milk | Clare | 01/03/’2201/03/2022 20:04:20 | – |
| swave | adj | Suave | Mark | 06/11/’2406/11/2024 23:17:00 | – |
| sweat cobs | v | Sweat profusely | Granny | 23/11/’2323/11/2023 23:34:23 | 08/11/’2408/11/2024 12:48:19 |
| swing-door face | n | One who enjoys eating out | Granny | 22/10/’2322/10/2023 00:59:27 | – |
| swooshbox | n | Dishwasher | M & N | 25/05/’2125/05/2021 16:09:00 | 16/12/’2416/12/2024 21:06:44 |
| T-rain | n | Train | Clayhoffs (aka Westerdons) | 15/11/’2215/11/2022 19:52:54 | – |
| tabitha-twitchit | adj | Fidgety, unsettled | Naomi | 06/11/’2406/11/2024 23:53:57 | – |
| tadpoles | n | A musical score | Mark | 02/03/’2202/03/2022 22:58:22 | 02/03/’2202/03/2022 23:02:05 |
| take the smooth with the rough | v | After physical or mental exertion, relax without guilt | Mark | 10/07/’2210/07/2022 22:49:13 | – |
| takes the skin off your teeth | exp | An effect of eating rhubarb | Bel | 09/03/’2209/03/2022 15:15:23 | – |
| talkie-walkie | n | Walkie-talkie | Mark | 27/04/’2127/04/2021 13:39:44 | – |
| tall, dark and handsome… and slightly out of focus | adj | The putative ideal qualities of an attractive woman’s male consort | Pa | 20/07/’2220/07/2022 00:09:54 | 26/07/’2226/07/2022 01:29:51 |
| taramadiddle | n | Like taradiddle, but taradiddlier | Naomi | 06/07/’2106/07/2021 14:56:37 | 30/04/’2330/04/2023 10:22:44 |
| tassel | n | Penis | Mark | 19/03/’2119/03/2021 15:15:11 | 21/11/’2121/11/2021 11:56:56 |
| tasting diamonds | v | The experience of breathing in very cold air | Joy | 12/02/’2412/02/2024 14:02:23 | 12/02/’2412/02/2024 16:09:31 |
| teaching wolves to chase sledges | exp | Misguided negotiation technique of making a concession without requiring the other party to do the same | Mark | 03/03/’2203/03/2022 16:21:10 | 27/02/’2327/02/2023 11:54:47 |
| Teetee de Boof | n | Tête de Bœuf restaurant in Wootton Wawen, Warwickshire | M & N | 05/03/’2205/03/2022 15:53:27 | 05/03/’2205/03/2022 15:56:26 |
| tell it not in Gath | exp | Between you and me… | Mark | 06/03/’2206/03/2022 23:18:39 | – |
| tentacles | n | Testicles | Mum | 28/01/’2228/01/2022 01:06:00 | – |
| Teshco | n | Tesco, the supermarket chain | Pa | 27/06/’2127/06/2021 16:11:18 | – |
| testiculae loquans | adj | Talking bollocks. Purveying rubbish | Mark | 05/12/’2105/12/2021 15:43:28 | 08/12/’2408/12/2024 13:36:51 |
| testiculate | v | Employ expansive gestures whilst talking bollocks | M & N | 11/08/’2111/08/2021 00:39:02 | 11/08/’2111/08/2021 12:23:39 |
| thalassa! thalassa! | exc | After many hours’ travel towards the seaside, there at last is the actual sea!
(thalassa = θαλασσα = sea) | Naomi | 19/03/’2119/03/2021 15:50:39 | 19/03/’2119/03/2021 15:54:33 |
| thank you Mrs Lowsborough Goosborough | verse | Thanks for nothing | Granny | 02/03/’2102/03/2021 00:26:27 | 05/03/’2205/03/2022 22:14:02 |
| that man did smack me with a needle! | exc | Toddler Mark’s blubbing reaction to an inoculation which he had not expected | Mark | 16/04/’2116/04/2021 14:35:07 | – |
| that’s an acquired taste: you either like it or you don’t | exp | I don’t like it | Clare | 08/03/’2208/03/2022 21:22:24 | 09/03/’2209/03/2022 14:53:32 |
| that’s easy for you to say | exp | Used to someone who has just struggled to express an idea | Mark | 05/05/’2405/05/2024 00:24:42 | – |
| that’s pissed on me chips! | exp | Crikey, that occurrence has confounded my endeavours! | Mark | 21/08/’2321/08/2023 08:39:26 | 23/08/’2323/08/2023 14:18:40 |
| that’s small onions | exp | That is the end. We have done all that we are here to do | Joy | 11/02/’2211/02/2022 11:36:49 | – |
| that’s the badger! | exc | Ah, *that* is the object/technique/problem/solution we were looking for | Mark | 26/05/’2126/05/2021 12:20:33 | 26/05/’2126/05/2021 12:27:52 |
| that’s your shauri! | exp | That is your problem / issue | Clare | 21/01/’2421/01/2024 01:18:35 | – |
| the artist is making a joke | exp | Its creator intended this to be funny or clever | Riverbankers | 18/04/’2218/04/2022 00:48:35 | – |
| the blind Doges of Venice | exp | Response to any reference to Venice, blind, blinds or dogs | Pa | 21/01/’2421/01/2024 00:59:39 | – |
| the camels are coming hurrah, hurrah! | verse | Pa’s jingle, delivered in an Anglo-Indian lilt, to go with jiggling a small child on his knee | Clare | 05/03/’2205/03/2022 16:28:47 | 05/03/’2205/03/2022 21:47:03 |
| the chop | n | A vasectomy | Naomi | 10/02/’2210/02/2022 15:10:33 | 10/02/’2210/02/2022 23:29:10 |
| the crow makes wing to th’ rooky wood | verse | Light thickens,
and the crow makes wing to th’ rooky wood.
Good things of day begin to droop and drowse;
While night’s black agents to their preys do rouse.
—Shakespeare’s Macbeth, Act III scene 2 | Naomi | 20/06/’2320/06/2023 16:08:30 | – |
| the customer is always the customer | exp | The supplier’s job is to satisfy the wants of the customer, however unhinged they might appear | Mark | 12/04/’2212/04/2022 00:18:19 | – |
| the door’s not shut on my genius but… | verse | I’ll eventually prove to be brilliant | Naomi | 08/03/’2208/03/2022 20:42:08 | – |
| the full catastrophe | exp | Everything; all of the thing we’re discussing | Naomi | 08/03/’2208/03/2022 20:54:03 | 06/11/’2406/11/2024 22:58:50 |
| the gap towns | n | Dorking, Woking, Reigate, Redhill, Guildford… | Pa | 01/07/’2201/07/2022 12:39:55 | – |
| the good ship Slap-it-with-a-ruler | exp | Meaning obscure, but it tended to be wheeled out when ships were spoken of | Granny | 12/11/’2312/11/2023 00:44:50 | 28/11/’2428/11/2024 20:35:39 |
| the job’s a good ’un | exp | We have achieved our objective | Mark | 12/02/’2212/02/2022 21:27:37 | – |
| the Marmalade Bush | n | The Cinnamon Tree, an Indian restaurant in Mortimer near Reading that was a favourite with the Arthurs | M & N | 24/01/’2324/01/2023 23:38:10 | 24/01/’2324/01/2023 23:54:13 |
| the nut holding the steering wheel | n | The driver of a road vehicle | Riverbankers | 31/08/’2231/08/2022 00:27:54 | – |
| the pit is in | exp | The fruit still contains its pip or stone | M & N | 31/08/’2231/08/2022 00:17:23 | – |
| the telephone upon the wall | verse | Callback to:
The telephone upon the wall
Is useful when you want to call
Just push the buttons on the front
And hold the mouthpiece to your face | Mark | 30/11/’2230/11/2022 00:53:27 | 22/01/’2422/01/2024 12:28:37 |
| the value of your investment can fall as well as plummet | exp | Mantra of the risk-averse | Riverbankers | 29/12/’2229/12/2022 14:46:59 | – |
| The Whizzer There Was | n | The Wizard of Oz | Joy | 18/03/’2218/03/2022 00:24:05 | – |
| then on Friday… no, tell a lie, it was the Saturday | exp | Caricature of that particular variety of storytelling that is long on irrelevant detail and short on, well, story | M & N | 22/03/’2122/03/2021 23:38:07 | – |
| there are gazelles in the thicket | exp | Your beard contains unwanted matter | King family | 03/09/’2303/09/2023 10:12:01 | 31/10/’2431/10/2024 15:56:54 |
| there was a young man of Tralee | verse | Callback to the limerish:
There was a young man of Tralee
Got stung on the nose by a wasp
When asked “Did it hurt?”
He said “No not a bit
Thank goodness it wasn’t a hornet” | Naomi | 27/05/’2127/05/2021 14:55:58 | 17/03/’2517/03/2025 08:46:16 |
| there we are then! | exc | What a silly person! | Bel | 27/06/’2127/06/2021 16:13:39 | 27/06/’2127/06/2021 16:13:56 |
| there’s a ghost, there’s a ghost, throw a flannel at its face! | exc | I see you have a flannel on your face. I am about to throw another at you. The flannel already on your face will make this a shocking experience | Riverbanklings | 12/03/’2112/03/2021 15:00:30 | 04/03/’2204/03/2022 00:13:57 |
| there’s no show without Punch | exp | Jobs don’t get done when the person who normally does them is away | Pop | 21/03/’2121/03/2021 22:36:33 | – |
| thermosk | n | Vacuum flask | Clayhoffs (aka Westerdons) | 28/09/’2228/09/2022 00:19:03 | – |
| they are curlews of the fenland! | verse | Call and response upon seeing a seagull. | Naomi | 09/03/’2109/03/2021 16:30:32 | 05/03/’2205/03/2022 22:15:25 |
| they’ll never sell ice creams at that speed | exp | An emergency vehicle is passing with its siren going | Iliff family | 11/02/’2211/02/2022 01:30:30 | 19/02/’2219/02/2022 21:18:42 |
| those are not bananas, they’re plantains | exp | A baffling and unfounded denigration of bananas | Granny | 09/03/’2209/03/2022 15:20:09 | 17/12/’2417/12/2024 12:09:16 |
| thoughcus | n | A thought | Mark | 17/07/’2217/07/2022 01:03:04 | 15/12/’2415/12/2024 10:50:41 |
| three ha’p’orth of gawd help us | exp | Disorganised, uncoordinated, a shambles | M & N | 05/03/’2105/03/2021 13:52:40 | 08/02/’2208/02/2022 21:27:00 |
| three-ee blice | verse | Three blind mice
…from the nursery rhyme | The Sisterhood | 26/05/’2126/05/2021 12:27:10 | 05/03/’2205/03/2022 22:16:03 |
| thunderwobbler | n | Spin dryer, or washing machine when spin drying | Mark | 11/03/’2111/03/2021 23:39:33 | – |
| tibbit! | exc | Shout to be given if first to sight a yellow hydrant during a car journey | G & A | 19/03/’2119/03/2021 22:42:25 | 22/10/’2322/10/2023 11:44:01 |
| ticky tacky | n | Shoddy building material | King family | 16/05/’2116/05/2021 23:47:48 | 25/05/’2125/05/2021 21:41:26 |
| tight as a crab’s arse under water | adj | Unduly economy-minded | Mark | 08/03/’2108/03/2021 15:59:03 | 10/02/’2210/02/2022 15:04:42 |
| time to put clothes on | exp | Time to get up | Herry | 21/03/’2121/03/2021 22:18:34 | 21/08/’2321/08/2023 08:41:46 |
| Tinkwinky Teapot | n | The TV adaptation of The Aurora Teagarden Mysteries | M & N | 17/07/’2217/07/2022 00:49:29 | 13/11/’2313/11/2023 11:03:01 |
| tinkywinky | adj | Cosy (of drama) | M & N | 27/08/’2327/08/2023 23:32:15 | 27/08/’2327/08/2023 23:47:16 |
| tiny dragon | n | The strange throat grumblings/squeakings/croakings made by an active digestive system | Aoife | 12/02/’2412/02/2024 13:59:54 | 12/02/’2412/02/2024 16:09:08 |
| tisbic | n | Biscuit | Jeremy | 01/07/’2201/07/2022 12:41:19 | – |
| tisswiss for Mummy | exp | Cue phrase for emptying a sleepy child during the night | Evelyn | 13/05/’2213/05/2022 01:07:22 | 13/05/’2213/05/2022 11:46:06 |
| toasty bombola | n | Heated car seat | Mark | 02/03/’2102/03/2021 00:43:30 | 30/11/’2430/11/2024 20:25:09 |
| toed in the hole | v | Kicked up the bum | M & N | 24/04/’2324/04/2023 14:28:18 | – |
| tolerably early night | exp | An early night, which the children involved would likely find intolerable and the adults highly tolerable | Granny | 21/03/’2121/03/2021 16:04:33 | – |
| Tony Tortoise | n | Actor & TV presenter Tony Robinson | M & N | 30/06/’2230/06/2022 23:11:23 | – |
| too much admin | exp | Mark’s objection to eating crab, artichoke, pomegranate, shrimp etc | Mark | 04/03/’2204/03/2022 15:27:07 | – |
| top it the nob | v | Come it high. Patronise. Act superior. Put on airs. | M & N | 28/02/’2528/02/2025 00:42:11 | 02/03/’2502/03/2025 11:50:10 |
| trampampoline | n | Trampoline | Riverbanklings | 12/02/’2412/02/2024 13:38:47 | 04/09/’2404/09/2024 12:27:24 |
| trifle, trifle come and get an eyeful | verse | Substitute chorus for the song Strawberry Fair | Granny | 27/06/’2527/06/2025 22:37:50 | 27/06/’2527/06/2025 22:34:52 |
| trivium | n | An incidental fact of little importance | Mark | 09/03/’2209/03/2022 15:11:18 | – |
| tronken | adj | Drunk | Joy | 12/02/’2412/02/2024 15:14:57 | 12/02/’2412/02/2024 16:13:43 |
| trough | v | Eat | King family | 29/12/’2229/12/2022 15:26:44 | – |
| trowers | n | Trousers | Joy | 11/02/’2211/02/2022 01:32:05 | – |
| trypo | n | Intentional typo for typo, a typographical error about typographical error | Mark | 05/03/’2105/03/2021 14:16:09 | 16/12/’2416/12/2024 21:09:46 |
| Turd & Cabbage | n | Slug & Lettuce, the restaurant chain | Mark | 27/06/’2127/06/2021 15:58:21 | – |
| turn the knob on your side | exp | Consciously unhelpful advice to someone struggling to get a door open. The ritual reply is “I haven’t got a knob on my side” | M & N | 25/11/’2325/11/2023 14:10:51 | 29/09/’2429/09/2024 15:32:58 |
| two minutes’ silence for the joke that just died | exp | That was a terrible joke that deserved to fall as flat as it did | Mark | 04/03/’2204/03/2022 15:34:31 | 04/03/’2204/03/2022 15:35:38 |
| two-six | exp | Cue for concerted action; same meaning as the more customary one-two-three | Mark | 12/07/’2212/07/2022 13:19:26 | 13/01/’2513/01/2025 19:55:05 |
| ump and tions | exp | What assumptions make an ass of | Mark | 20/08/’2120/08/2021 21:57:34 | – |
| un joo lating | adj | Undulating, usually in reference to rolling hills | Win | 20/01/’2320/01/2023 00:45:21 | – |
| undercrackers | n | Underpants | Mark | 05/02/’2205/02/2022 21:38:15 | – |
| undercrunk | n | Strip of pebbles just below the waterline on an otherwise sandy beach | Mark | 03/03/’2103/03/2021 13:46:38 | 07/03/’2107/03/2021 12:05:26 |
| underneath-th-th | n | A woman’s ladyparts | M & N | 24/01/’2324/01/2023 23:31:54 | – |
| uninvited guest at every conversation | n | TV | Granny | 05/07/’2105/07/2021 18:08:16 | – |
| unleaded | adj | Decaffeinated | Pa | 12/05/’2112/05/2021 21:50:33 | – |
| unmatched pointer | n | A loose end; an unresolved issue | Naomi | 18/03/’2218/03/2022 00:36:34 | – |
| up to a point, Lord Copper | exp | No | Paul H | 27/06/’2127/06/2021 15:46:16 | – |
| up your end | exp | Phrase used when passing vegetable dishes around a dining table | Arthur family | 18/04/’2218/04/2022 00:38:24 | – |
| Useless | n | James Joyce’s Ulysses | Riverbankers | 13/05/’2213/05/2022 00:59:08 | 13/05/’2213/05/2022 01:00:08 |
| vacs up nice | adj | Responds well to treatment with a vacuum cleaner | M & N | 08/03/’2108/03/2021 12:28:45 | – |
| varia cum fortuna | exp | With absolutely no success whatsoever | Mark | 06/11/’2406/11/2024 23:06:52 | 06/11/’2406/11/2024 23:46:50 |
| vauum | n | The sound of a vacuum-flush lavatory | M & N | 04/03/’2104/03/2021 13:07:31 | 05/03/’2105/03/2021 14:42:24 |
| village aunty | n | Vigilante | Iliff family | 19/08/’2119/08/2021 12:48:38 | 01/01/’2501/01/2025 23:09:25 |
| Village People parking | n | The parking of vehicles in a slapdash or disorderly manner | Felix | 28/01/’2528/01/2025 01:26:14 | 15/02/’2515/02/2025 10:17:34 |
| visitors! Not visitors AGAIN! | verse | Refrain in a poem the 7-year-old Naomi wrote expressing the kids’ dislike of the use of their home as a University Visitors’ Centre by Pa | King family | 21/01/’2421/01/2024 15:06:13 | – |
| Vladdy the Baddy | n | Vladimir Vladimirovich Putin, sometime thug and latterly president of Russia… and thug | M & N | 25/11/’2325/11/2023 16:23:53 | 25/11/’2325/11/2023 18:14:08 |
| vladivostok | exc | Exclamation for covering a belch | Granny | 17/03/’2117/03/2021 21:11:27 | 17/12/’2417/12/2024 00:18:04 |
| vogon | adj | Vegan | Riverbankers | 07/11/’2207/11/2022 00:20:03 | 15/12/’2415/12/2024 21:16:23 |
| vollay! | exc | I am about to hit you | Mark | 01/07/’2201/07/2022 12:50:33 | – |
| vollyvongs | n | The small puff pastry cases known as vols-au-vent, used for appetisers and desserts | Iliff family | 01/07/’2201/07/2022 13:37:05 | – |
| VP-tent | n | Vickers VC10, a commercial airliner | King family | 30/09/’2430/09/2024 10:48:24 | 30/09/’2430/09/2024 11:16:22 |
| vulture capitalist | n | Venture capitalist | Mark | 05/12/’2105/12/2021 15:51:48 | – |
| wacha kelele | exc | Be quiet! Pipe down! Shut up! | King family | 30/09/’2430/09/2024 10:57:41 | – |
| wadundudundu | n | Sleeping policeman (speed bump) intended as a traffic-calming measure | King family | 21/03/’2121/03/2021 14:45:08 | 28/08/’2328/08/2023 10:31:38 |
| walky duck | verse | Callback to:
Walky duck, walky duck
Lost his leg and he can’t get up | Dad | 13/12/’2413/12/2024 21:16:05 | 13/12/’2413/12/2024 21:56:10 |
| wall botherer | n | Hammer drill | Aoife | 24/01/’2324/01/2023 23:33:11 | – |
| Waly Disneq | n | Walt Disney | Mark | 07/11/’2107/11/2021 23:09:50 | – |
| wankpalazzo | n | Stately home | Mark | 04/05/’2404/05/2024 23:51:38 | – |
| wankpanzer | n | Large agricultural vehicle when chosen for use in an urban environment | Mark | 12/04/’2212/04/2022 00:14:28 | 08/11/’2408/11/2024 12:56:10 |
| warned in a dream | exp | Take a different route | M & N | 06/09/’2106/09/2021 01:00:55 | 06/09/’2106/09/2021 01:07:54 |
| warning-warning | exp | Everything is fine | M & N | 05/02/’2205/02/2022 21:31:39 | 21/01/’2421/01/2024 11:35:25 |
| Warr-Doorr | n | Wardour Street in London, a centre of the film industry | M & N | 21/11/’2121/11/2021 01:22:56 | – |
| wash horses | v | Wash hair | Naomi | 02/03/’2102/03/2021 00:45:30 | 24/03/’2124/03/2021 13:55:02 |
| washing machine | n | A water’s-edge game: while able to stand, hold hands facing inwards in a ring; float & kick legs to make a splash, and if possible get some rotation going. For 4+ participants | Mum | 28/07/’2128/07/2021 14:00:33 | 28/07/’2128/07/2021 14:08:04 |
| watergasm | n | The feeling of bliss achieved when cold-water swimming (usually below 12°C) after your body has overcome the shock and pain of entering the water and before the cold dangerously enters your core leading to hypothermia. A sense of calm when you feel at one with the natural world, totally relaxed and unaware of time | Bel | 22/10/’2422/10/2024 16:40:57 | 22/10/’2422/10/2024 16:43:12 |
| we are the cockyolly birds all red and green and gold | verse | Fragment of a song Evelyn suddenly burst into after it sat dormant and unsung in her memory for 40 years | Evelyn | 07/03/’2207/03/2022 00:24:35 | – |
| we won’t have to go to Wales now I brung yer ’ere | exp | Now we have seen this poor model, imitation or ersatz version, we won’t have to visit the real thing | M & N | 20/07/’2220/07/2022 00:14:34 | 09/12/’2209/12/2022 00:10:39 |
| wee board | n | The pastry base of a tart | Uncle Frank | 03/03/’2103/03/2021 13:44:27 | – |
| wee knights | n | Week nights | M & N | 02/02/’2202/02/2022 00:39:54 | 02/02/’2202/02/2022 10:53:01 |
| well and truly sought after | adj | Under pressure | Naomi | 08/10/’2208/10/2022 01:20:03 | – |
| well that barrel didn’t need scraping | exp | This work is eploitative, deceptive, manipulative, inept or otherwise objectionable… and to an even greater degree than previous similar works | Mark | 02/04/’2402/04/2024 18:07:37 | 02/04/’2402/04/2024 18:22:11 |
| wellcome home | exp | Welcome home | Bel | 16/03/’2116/03/2021 14:23:23 | 12/01/’2512/01/2025 12:44:43 |
| Wert | n | A bird sculpted in alabaster by Mum | Mum | 11/02/’2411/02/2024 01:10:48 | 13/02/’2513/02/2025 11:31:11 |
| we’ve squeezed the goodness out of that | exp | All the interesting or entertaining aspects of this topic have now been exhausted | M & N | 01/03/’2201/03/2022 14:59:24 | – |
| whackers | n | Lies | King family | 02/03/’2102/03/2021 00:01:29 | – |
| whackysticky | n | Border morris dancing, the flavour of that noble art that involves the percussive use of staves | Mark | 03/03/’2203/03/2022 14:03:02 | – |
| what a day dad had! | exc | Father has suffered some setbacks today | Riverbankers | 10/07/’2210/07/2022 16:00:45 | – |
| what a fall of royalty! | exc | Goodness, those picture cards were badly defeated! | Granny | 12/03/’2112/03/2021 18:04:02 | – |
| what about a water bottle Wattle? | exp | The sound of a fart while bathing | Mark | 24/01/’2324/01/2023 23:51:13 | 25/01/’2325/01/2023 10:53:51 |
| what has it got in its pocketses? | exp | What do you have in your pocket? (or What does that person have in their pocket?) | Naomi | 04/05/’2404/05/2024 23:57:30 | 05/05/’2405/05/2024 00:42:16 |
| what mind is here o’erthrown | exp | What was they thinking? That is an uncharacteristically ill-considered remark, decision or action. That contrivance is unnecessarily complex | Pa | 23/03/’2123/03/2021 23:02:04 | 02/12/’2402/12/2024 08:26:07 |
| what will you have? said the waiter | exp | A callback to this ditty:
“What will you have?” said the waiter, pensively picking his nose
“Two boiled eggs, you scoundrel – you won’t get your fingers in those” | Dad | 12/05/’2112/05/2021 21:54:45 | 29/12/’2129/12/2021 12:24:28 |
| whearr be ye to? | exp | Where are you? | Clare | 27/02/’2327/02/2023 12:12:57 | – |
| when a man is tired of Bracknell… | exp | Callback to:
When a man is tired of Bracknell he has been there 20 mins | Riverbankers | 10/03/’2210/03/2022 18:25:10 | – |
| when I was a little girl like you… | exp | Pa’s teasing approach to storytelling:
Pa: When I was a little girl like you…
Small ♀: You weren’t a little girl!
Pa: Then, when I was a little boy like you…
Small ♀: But I am not a little boy!
↻ repeat until one party cracks | Pa | 09/03/’2209/03/2022 16:13:18 | – |
| when you get to the final, you win | exp | When you make it to the final of a competition, you expect to win | M & N | 18/04/’2218/04/2022 00:44:45 | 26/11/’2426/11/2024 20:35:00 |
| where we have been no-one shall find, For not a trace have we left behind | verse | Reminder to all, when leaving a spot they had spent time in, to look back to check they have taken all their stuff with them.
Callback to:
Where we have been no one can find,
Not a trace have we left behind.
Only the people we’ve helped today
Know that the Brownies have passed this way. | Evelyn | 08/03/’2208/03/2022 22:59:52 | 09/03/’2209/03/2022 13:12:15 |
| where we have been, no-one can tell | exp | We have left this picnic spot, beach or other location as we found it – well done us | King family | 03/03/’2103/03/2021 13:28:52 | 06/03/’2106/03/2021 14:14:02 |
| where’s the yucky bowl? | exp | This meal is not entirely palatable | Laurie | 23/04/’2123/04/2021 23:17:43 | 26/11/’2426/11/2024 16:16:41 |
| which is why I’m bothering telling you so | exp | Used after explaining the relevance of an apparently tangential comment | Riverbankers | 11/08/’2411/08/2024 00:35:56 | – |
| which wind begins with F? | exp | Callback to a question asked while trying to figure out how to play mah jong | Dad | 07/11/’2207/11/2022 00:47:51 | – |
| while you’re on your feet… | exp | By standing up you have made yourself liable for any tasks that I want doing (such as bringing us all a cup of tea) | Mum | 19/03/’2219/03/2022 15:33:18 | – |
| whin | n | Gooseberry | Dad | 07/11/’2207/11/2022 00:27:52 | – |
| whipper snipper | n | String trimmer, the powered tool for trimming grass and brush. | Clare | 28/09/’2228/09/2022 00:16:06 | – |
| white horse | n | A perfect guest | JM | 21/03/’2221/03/2022 00:58:39 | – |
| white seals | n | White folk swimming in the Thames, especially before the suntan season | Riverbankers | 30/03/’2130/03/2021 15:32:16 | – |
| whocares | n | County when filling in a web form | Mark | 03/04/’2103/04/2021 13:36:41 | 08/01/’2508/01/2025 22:44:18 |
| who’s died? | exp | Your flies are undone | Win | 30/03/’2230/03/2022 00:54:24 | – |
| who’s going round the roundabout? | verse | (Rhetorical) | Uncle Tony | 19/03/’2119/03/2021 15:42:18 | 05/03/’2205/03/2022 22:17:46 |
| who’s “she” – the cat’s mother? | exc | Refer to women by their names, not pronouns! | Granny | 03/04/’2103/04/2021 13:21:19 | 03/04/’2103/04/2021 13:37:13 |
| Whydofools | n | The Cornish amber ale Doom Bar | Mark | 31/08/’2231/08/2022 00:09:08 | 01/10/’2401/10/2024 11:44:47 |
| william-nilliam | adv | Willy-nilly, which is to say haphazardly | Mark | 30/07/’2330/07/2023 23:25:24 | – |
| windowscreen | n | A vehicle’s windscreen | M & N | 01/07/’2201/07/2022 13:40:46 | 21/10/’2421/10/2024 15:09:59 |
| winnebago | n | A Milwaukee brand tape measure | Naomi | 30/03/’2230/03/2022 01:24:26 | – |
| wishywashy place | n | The under-bed compartment that serves as a laundry basket at Heron Island | Riverbanklings | 27/05/’2127/05/2021 14:16:29 | 21/11/’2121/11/2021 13:09:57 |
| wisp | n | Whist | Joy | 30/03/’2130/03/2021 21:14:10 | – |
| with two plombs | adj | With consummate poise and assurance | Mark | 25/11/’2325/11/2023 14:00:02 | – |
| Witherspoons | n | Wetherspoons, aka Spoons, the UK pub chain specialising in low prices, sticky floors and light recreational fascism | Naomi | 28/02/’2528/02/2025 00:42:09 | 27/02/’2527/02/2025 13:46:31 |
| wi’ oor knickers hangin’ doon | exp | Obligatory rejoinder to “we’re off tae toon” (or “we’re off to town”, as the case may be) | Naomi | 24/03/’2124/03/2021 15:49:47 | 28/01/’2528/01/2025 01:00:02 |
| wo der Kaiser zu fuss geht | n | The seat of ease, lavatory, boggo or whatever you choose to call it | Clare | 28/09/’2228/09/2022 00:08:36 | – |
| wobblevoice | n | Singing with vibrato, especially when taken to excess | Mark | 04/09/’2104/09/2021 13:13:35 | 11/02/’2211/02/2022 01:18:00 |
| wobulence | n | Mild turbulence | Mark | 03/03/’2103/03/2021 13:23:14 | – |
| WOMBAT | n | Waste of money, brains and time | Mark | 05/03/’2105/03/2021 14:19:07 | 05/03/’2105/03/2021 14:44:08 |
| word association football | n | Word association | M & N | 11/08/’2411/08/2024 00:45:57 | – |
| words of advice concerning sex and travel | exp | A forthright imprecation to go away | Mark | 02/01/’2502/01/2025 00:16:43 | 02/01/’2502/01/2025 00:16:09 |
| worms’ boggin’ holes | n | Worm casts on a lawn | King family | 28/09/’2228/09/2022 14:59:36 | – |
| Wrox-ham | verse | The Norfolk town Wroxham | Riverbankers | 26/07/’2426/07/2024 16:22:17 | 06/11/’2406/11/2024 18:35:24 |
| wut‽ | exc | Like what‽, but whattier | Riverbankers | 16/04/’2116/04/2021 14:39:43 | – |
| yam all right our kid? | exp | Do you fare well, sibling? | Mark | 20/03/’2120/03/2021 16:04:23 | – |
| yellow is mellow, but if it’s brown flush it down | exp | Flush poo but not pee | Pa | 08/03/’2108/03/2021 14:11:13 | – |
| Yizanastikov the Russian | exp | He has a nasty cough | Granny | 30/01/’2230/01/2022 13:16:53 | – |
| you are my sunshine, my only sunshine | verse | The song:
You are my sunshine, my only sunshine
You make me happy when skies are grey
You’ll never know, dear, how much I love you!
Please don’t take my sunshine away! | King family | 04/03/’2204/03/2022 16:21:20 | 05/03/’2205/03/2022 22:18:24 |
| You are very ugly today, Pa/Ma Ubu! | exp | A gently loving greeting to one’s spouse in the morning | Clare | 28/02/’2228/02/2022 15:59:35 | 16/12/’2416/12/2024 13:39:29 |
| you can go off people | exp | A person I have hitherto admired has done or said something reprehensible | Mum | 27/04/’2127/04/2021 13:36:54 | – |
| you can never be happier than your unhappiest child | exp | (What it says) | Mum | 11/01/’2511/01/2025 23:48:49 | 12/01/’2512/01/2025 12:39:09 |
| you can see the strings | exp | The presentation, negotiation or other management skill fails to come across as seamless and authentic | Mark | 02/01/’2502/01/2025 00:15:34 | – |
| you daft ha’p’orth! | exc | That is entertainingly silly | Granny | 07/04/’2107/04/2021 21:50:47 | 08/04/’2108/04/2021 09:34:43 |
| you may walk down the garden to pick corn, but you must run back! | exp | One of Clare’s gardening homilies based on the fact that the moment you pick corn, the sugars (yummy) start to change to carbohydrates (dull) | Clare | 28/07/’2428/07/2024 14:20:27 | – |
| you must give me the recipe | exp | That meal was appalling | Pa | 20/03/’2120/03/2021 16:05:58 | 21/03/’2121/03/2021 15:49:53 |
| you with wobbly bottoms, climbing up that tree | verse | Alternative lyrics to Land of Hope & Glory | Naomi | 24/05/’2524/05/2025 23:43:58 | – |
| your egg’s broken | exp | One of the things I’m cooking for us is less perfect than the other, and I’ve decided to give it to you | M & N | 27/05/’2127/05/2021 14:48:51 | 26/11/’2426/11/2024 20:26:14 |
| your tiny hand is frozen! | verse | Your hand (not necessarily tiny) is frozen | Naomi | 09/03/’2109/03/2021 16:26:46 | 19/03/’2219/03/2022 22:38:55 |
| you’ll have it dark! | exp | Hurry up! At this rate you are unlikely to finish before nightfall | Pop | 02/01/’2502/01/2025 00:17:47 | 28/01/’2528/01/2025 00:56:47 |
| you’ve all done very well | exp | You’ve all done very well | Mum | 19/03/’2319/03/2023 13:41:18 | – |
| yow cor wack it | exp | That would be hard to beat | Mark | 18/12/’2118/12/2021 14:56:54 | 31/12/’2131/12/2021 13:37:17 |
| yuckerypoogens! | exc | Indicates that a thing is more than ordinarily messy or disgusting | Naomi | 10/07/’2210/07/2022 16:24:14 | – |
| zembil | n | Large basket, tub, trug or storage bucket | Naomi | 30/07/’2330/07/2023 23:44:25 | 19/08/’2319/08/2023 10:25:04 |
| zizzer-zoof seeds | n | Features, especially in software, “which nobody wants, because nobody needs” | Riverbankers | 03/03/’2103/03/2021 13:25:12 | 12/03/’2112/03/2021 16:13:19 |
| zlotniks | n | A wedgie | Mark | 12/03/’2112/03/2021 15:21:41 | 29/12/’2129/12/2021 12:45:06 |
| Zoroastronaut | n | A follower of Zoroaster. A Zoroastrian | Pa | 02/01/’2502/01/2025 00:13:56 | 01/01/’2501/01/2025 23:07:56 |
| __y-tiger | adj | Completed with the relationship e.g. mummy/wifey/spousey to mean being naturally protective of someone with whom you have that relationship | Naomi | 12/02/’2412/02/2024 14:13:51 | 29/09/’2429/09/2024 15:12:27 |
| Σa ≠ d | exp | Data is not the plural of anecdote. Multiple anecdotes do not constitute data | Mark | 31/03/’2531/03/2025 00:27:34 | 01/04/’2501/04/2025 10:00:47 |
| ’twill fit!! | exc | Despite signs to the contrary, this jigsaw piece WILL fit! | Granny Collard | 08/03/’2208/03/2022 22:44:53 | – |
Iliff-King phrasebook 
